What I gained from a turbulent week.
This past week or so has been a truly intense time, packed with new challenges, unexpected events, and family matters all overlapping. It was such a whirlwind of days that I was running almost entirely on sheer willpower, doing what I wanted and what I had to do, all while staying on the fine line of not letting it affect my health. Now that I've mostly finished everything, a precious 'realization' has emerged within me.
1. A new challenge: My first podcast recording
My Frescobol friends (Gan-chan and Kabe-chan, a couple who moved to Fukuoka at the end of last October) already host a podcast called 'Suki Kenkyu Radio' (Like Research Radio), and they kindly invited me to be a guest. Separately, Kabe-chan also made an interesting proposal for the two of us girls to start something new related to Frescobol, and I experienced my first podcast recording. That day (Saturday) was rainy, so we couldn't play Frescobol, making it the perfect timing.
Sitting in front of headphones and a microphone to talk at length was actually as nerve-wracking as a Frescobol tournament, but before I knew it, I got used to it and was able to enjoy it, talking for 50 minutes. As expected of the Frescobol I love!
We even thought about the podcast concept, name, and thumbnail design together, and I found that time enjoyable as well.
A realization about this act of 'talking'.
When asked, 'Do you like talking?', I had never been able to answer 'yes' or 'no' clearly and immediately until now. This is because I would always think in my head, 'I like the act of talking itself, but I'm bad at starting conversations when there are multiple people around, so I end up just listening. Overall, I honestly can't say if I like it or dislike it...' and I would dwell too much on that sense of inadequacy. However, after doing a one-on-one podcast and being asked that question again, I understood clearly.
I just have environments where I'm good at talking and environments where I'm not (one-on-one vs. one-on-many), and the act of talking itself is something I 'like'.
Recently, it had become hard to see what I 'like' or what I 'want to do', but by the two of them inviting me to the entrance by saying, 'Let's just try it first,' I was able to reconfirm the 'like' part once again.
Regarding the same 'like' and 'want to do', there is something precious that the owner of the seaside coffee shop (TABBY’S COFFEE ROASTER) I frequent during breaks from Frescobol practice on weekends said to me while we were chatting.
'You won't know if something suits you or not unless you try it. Since you have time now, you should open the doors to various things, and if it's different, you can just close them again. You should just repeat that process and find what you want to do.'
These words sank right into me, and I felt strongly that I wanted to keep them with me now.
Indeed, the podcast recording was an experience that allowed me to do the work of opening that door, and I'm glad I tried it.
Recently, I am keenly aware that I am truly blessed with the people around me. While feeling the inevitability of fate that these are people I was meant to meet, I am also truly grateful and want to properly thank them for the connection, and I want to deliver the '
happiness' called 'like' to those around me!
After such a fulfilling experience, I had a sleepover at Gan-chan and Kabe-chan's house! (They are truly warm people who, not long after we met, kindly invited me to stay at their place, considering that the practice location was far from my home and the burden that caused me. Since then, I've been visiting every time we practice on weekends, which I'm truly grateful for, and above all, it's fun to do various things together!)
That day, even though I felt exhausted, for some reason I couldn't sleep at night. With only a few hours of sleep, I went to Frescobol with the two of them again the next Sunday morning... After watching the Tunisia match together from the afternoon, my physical strength reached its limit. Since it was Father's Day and I wanted to express my daily gratitude, I returned home early.
Meanwhile, when I got home, I was told that my grandmother had been rushed to the hospital and was in the HCU (High Care Unit). While my worry grew, I had to prepare for the trial session the following weekend, so I managed to keep my heart and body moving.
Furthermore, because my mother, who was busy dealing with that, became exhausted and fell ill, while nursing her, I also took actions to protect myself at a minimum so that I wouldn't collapse as well while my own fatigue was building up.
Because I was able to look at myself from a bird's-eye view—knowing that I tend to act wanting to help others even if I have to sacrifice myself and put myself last—I was able to rely on my father when things were beyond my capacity, which led to me protecting myself even a little bit by relying on others.
2. Trouble and unity: Switching the Frescobol trial session indoors
For the Frescobol trial session scheduled for the following weekend, bad weather became highly likely, so I stayed in close contact with the management team and made the sudden decision on Thursday night to switch to 'holding it in an indoor studio'.
Friday was a series of rushes, watching the Sweden match from the morning, then final preparations and notifying members, but on Saturday, the day of the event, we successfully pulled off the indoor trial session, and I keenly felt that it was only possible because the team supported me. Also, being able to deliver smiles through Frescobol and gaining that sense of accomplishment was one big harvest this time. Above all, I was happy to see everyone smiling as they participated.
And after finishing the trial session, I was grateful to receive happy words from those around me, such as 'You have a good face,' 'You were shining,' and 'You had the best smile ever and were sparkling.'
Actually, the indoor studio where we held the trial session had mirrors covering one wall where you could even dance, and when I suddenly noticed myself overflowing with smiles reflected in the mirror, I keenly felt that
making many people smile through Frescobol is this happy, fun, and blissful.
I still have many things I want to do, so I want to give shape to this!
Please take a look at the event report below to see how the trial session went!
3. Family matters and changes in physical condition
After finishing the trial session on Saturday and practice the following day, I went to visit my grandmother in the hospital with my family on Monday. I drove 2-3 hours each way to see her.
Although I am still worried, I was relieved to hear that she is on the road to recovery and glad that I was able to see her safely.
My grandmother doesn't usually say things like this, but this time she said, "Come visit again." Because she is precious family and a dear person to me, I would go to see her even if she didn't ask, and I want to go, and above all, I want togo and bring her some energyagain.
After that, the moment I arrived home safely after another 2-3 hour drive from the hospital, the tension I had been holding onto snapped all at once, and I pushed myself to the limit both mentally and physically to the point where my stomach hurt, perhaps from the relief. (My stomach is weak here too... haha)
4. Learning: "The power of the individual and the team" gained from the Japan national soccer team
That day, despite my fatigue, I managed to stay awake past midnight into Tuesday to cheer for the Brazil match in the Soccer World Cup, but I realized I had fallen asleep 20 minutes before the match started. I was barely woken up by my family and watched the World Cup with them.
The result was disappointing, but I felt great respect for the way they became "one team" and moved us, and at the same time, it overlapped with my own self in Frescobol.
To be a good team, the individual is also important. I reaffirmed that I want to "become an autonomous player as an individual" and use that as a team."
Conclusion
Actually, there are still a few more things I decided to do and things I have to do within this week!
With the keywords I gained this week: "love for Frescobol", "autonomy", and "family" in my heart, I want to run through to the end with all my might while taking care of my health! Plus, there is a tournament next weekend, so I can't let my guard down...! July looks like it will be an intense month too.
This week was so intense and fulfilling, and I experienced many emotions, but since the events of this week seemed like they would become food for me to grow even a little, I wanted to organize them, so I looked back on them again. Actually, this is just a part of an overly intense week. There were still other events I wanted to look back on, so I will write about them separately.
So that I can laugh about it someday, saying there was a time like this, now is the time to try various things! Let's do our best.
To you who read this far into someone else's week, wondering what it was all about, thank you so much!
● Here is the podcast delivered by my favorite Frescobol couple, who always give me new stimulation and opportunities for challenges, including this podcast! (Series of introducing things on my own ①)
Here is the episode where the couple talks about Frescobol on "Suki Kenkyu Radio"!
● TABBY’S COFFEE ROASTER is here! (This is also part of my series of introducing things on my own ②)
It is the best space where you can enjoy coffee while looking at the Fukuma Coast (Fukutsu City, Fukuoka Prefecture) that spreads out in front of you! You might be able to hear various stories about coffee beans from around the world and their origins?! A warm and wonderful travel-loving owner will brew your coffee.
On the sandy beach right in front of it (Fukuma Coast), the local club Frescobol Fukuoka plays "Frescobol," which originated in Brazil, where you care for your partner and keep the rally going every Saturday. You can experience it on the spot every Saturday, so please feel free to come and play at the beautiful beach. You can come empty-handed.