Thoughts for my mother that I offer now💛

In the morning, as I am weeding the garden as usual, I hear the music of "Television Gymnastics" from the house.

My 87-year-old mother is doing "Television Gymnastics".

I suddenly thought.

This music I hear every day...

If, after my mother passes away,

I wonder if I will remember my mother every time I hear this music.

When I thought that, tears came to my eyes...

Our two-family home☆

I live in a two-family home.
The first floor is for my mother and younger brother, and the second floor is for our family... Now it is just me and my husband...
Our two children are people working in Tokyo and Tochigi respectively...

My husband built an extension onto my parents' house to make it a two-family home.

We had been living in an apartment, and both of our children had become elementary school students, so it was getting cramped, and when we were thinking about building a house,

"If you two don't mind, it's fine if you make our house a two-family home"

said my father and mother.

For me, I worried about many things, such as not being able to have freedom if we lived together, and what my husband's parents would think, even though my husband is a second son.

I talked it over with my husband, got the approval of his parents, and decided to make it a two-family home.

Originally, on the second floor, there was my room, a tatami room, my father's study, and a large storage room.

Therefore, we did a renovation to add two children's rooms, a kitchen, a balcony, and a laundry drying area.

We shared the bath. (When there were many people, I regretted this a little💦)

My father's study was separated by the stairs, so we left it as my father's study.
(That is why, until he passed away, he would come to the study on the second floor and fold our laundry.)

Because the stairs are right by the entrance, when I was working, there were days when we didn't see each other.
We decided to help each other when things were tough, but still maintain our privacy, and we started with separate meals in the two-family home.

I think this became a life where living together did not cause stress.

When we made it a two-family home, my younger brother was married and living separately.

When my father collapsed from a myocardial infarction over 10 years ago, my younger brother had just divorced and lost his job, so he returned to his parents' home.
Therefore, until my father passed away, it was a life on the first floor with my parents and my younger brother.

After the children left the nest, my mother became elderly, and my father passed away, I proposed that we eat meals together.

However, for my mother, she was considerate of my husband, and since my younger brother was also there, for the sake of both sides,
"As long as I can move, separate is better," she said.

For my mother, it seems that providing a place for my younger brother who returned after a divorce, and cooking meals for my younger brother, are things she "wants to do for him," so I accepted my mother's proposal.

This sense of distance might be comfortable for each of us, perhaps.

That said, I bring over a dish, or I cook when she's not feeling well, so the environment is gradually changing so that my mother doesn't have to do everything herself.
I'm sure it will continue to change from here on out.

Everything is about 'time'.

My mother's daily routine☆

My mother has things she makes a routine of every day.

If I were still working like I was back then...

If I weren't living with my mother...

I might not have known that my mother was building up her daily life like this.

I'm glad I realized it before I lost it...

The trivial conversations with my mother,

and the serious conversations where we talk things through properly,

I'm happy for these days where I can go to her side whenever I'm called.

At the very least, I am happy, so happy, and grateful that I can spend this time, which might be limited, together with my mother like this now💛

It's not that there wasn't any friction with my mother when I was young...

But now, by accepting each other and being needed, I can truly feel that I was loved,
and the feelings I once struggled with have faded away.

Now, I believe from the bottom of my heart that I love my mother.

And, I am truly grateful for her existence.

I want to cherish the days I have left with my mother💛

Another story I wrote about my mother💛

Thank you for reading again today,
thank you very much<m(__)m>

【書いた人】
江村恵子＠終活ワーカー／ゆるふわおしゃべり相談所
「恵子」さん、または「ゆるふわ」さん　
と呼んでください(*^-^*) 

保育業界を退職して、
縁あって 
『終活』に関する学びと 
広める活動をしています。 

今は、群馬県の 
『終活アドバイザーサークルの代表』を
担っています。 

Noteでは、 
『喜んで豊かに生きる素敵な人生』 
について、 
『終活』（人生の終わりのための準備） 
について、 
また趣味である畑仕事や旅行、
家族のこと・エッセイ 
などを書いています。

今後は、 
終活ワーカー（終活のお手伝いをする人）として、 
「素敵に生きる人生について」
オンライン、オフラインで
「ゆるふわに」お話し会や 座談会、雑談会
相談会などを開催予定です。

Twitterもしています。 
Twitterでは、
特に自分で撮った花や自然について 投稿したり、 
同様の投稿をしている人をフォローしたり 
RTしたりしています。 

Noteとも共有で投稿することも多いです 
https://twitter.com/mix8853

よろしくお願いいたします<m(__)m>

#Mother
#Love
#Gratitude
#DailyNote
#Renovation
#TwoFamilyHome