If you want to persuade someone, why not start by making a suggestion?

I want to persuade them!
Do as I say!

People are creatures who often
think, "I want to make the other person do what I want."
.

In such cases, what kind of
persuasion method do you use?

Could it be that
you are persuading them with harsh words?

For example...

"You must do more of this!"
"Get this done by tomorrow."
"Why can't you do this?"

These are the kinds of words.

Commonly known as...
"imperative form"words.

"Imperative form"words require caution because
unless there is a deep level of trust,
the relationship is likely to break down.

So, if you want them to do what you want,
how should you convey it to them?

The answer is"to suggest"as a way of communicating.

"Do this"

Instead of that...

"There is also this way to do it"

Try suggesting it like that.

No matter who they are, if they are
"imperative form"harsh language used on them,
they will feel annoyed at least once.

In their heart...

"You don't have to go that far."
"Who does this guy think he is?"
"They're using their position too conveniently..."

That kind of rebellious spirit starts to sprout.

If a relationship of trust has been built in daily life,
even if you are told something in harsh words,

"It can't be helped..."
"If this person says so..."
"I was wrong."

you will reconsider your thinking,
and logical thinking will kick in.

Well, though... harsh words
are almost always disliked.

If said emotionally,
the person being told will also perceive things emotionally.

If you clash with harsh emotions,
they will clash back with harsh emotions.

No matter how correct the content of what the other person is saying is,
you will plot to find their faults.

Because it was said with harsh emotions.

"There's a way to say things!"

you become emotional.

So, how do you get the other person to agree
and take action?

"Convey your thoughts to the other person as a proposal"

This is it.

A one-sided imperative form like "You just do this"
gives the other person no choice,
and only creates discomfort.

If they are the weaker party or in a weaker position,
there may be times when that is okay, but...
(Of course, let's also think about how to say it)

So!

A way of communicating that gives the other person options
| |
making a proposal

This approach is recommended!

Giving the other person options
makes them feel“respected.”
as far as they are concerned.

Therefore, if it is a proposal, it is easier to accept,
and they will consider it as one of the candidates.

Since it is part of the options,
they also feel free to choose,
and they will accept it easily.

Of course,
whether they execute it or not is up to them.

That part is a test of patience.

If they do execute it, consider it a bonus,
and waiting patiently is the right answer.

If they execute it,
it is like our victory.

The other person won't listen to what I say.

If you feel that way, you might be demanding too much from them
and projecting harsh emotions
onto them.

The other person is human, too.

They are creatures that move by emotion.

That is precisely why the communication style of
“making a proposal,”which respects the other person's value, is effective.

I hope you find this helpful.
See you again.