Hold Out Both Hands and Say Thank You

In our home, beef was an endangered species.

Only chicken or pork inhabited our dining table, I thought butter was food for the aristocracy, and cup noodles were a luxury item.

In short, we were poor.

My mother is a single mother.
She raised my younger brother and me all by herself.

At the time, we were living in my mother's parents' house, so we didn't have to pay rent, but since my mother paid for all other utilities, groceries, and daily necessities, our household finances were in dire straits every month.

My mother's take-home pay was about 100,000 yen a month. How she managed the household budget with that is one of the seven wonders of our family.

But, and this is a true story that sounds like a lie, I didn't know we were poor until I became a university student.

When I was in elementary school, I lived in a world where my allowance was 500 yen, so I genuinely thought we must be quite wealthy since she was receiving 100,000 yen a month.

My mother never once showed my brother or me that she was worried about not having money.

Even when I was in junior high and high school and began to understand the value of money, we never struggled for food, and I thought we were a relatively normal family, even if we weren't rich (though that was thanks to my maternal grandparents).

However, when I became a university student, I was shocked.

People whose parents paid their tuition as a matter of course. People who covered all their living expenses with an allowance without working part-time. People who were bought cars for their birthdays.

Because there were so many such people around me, I was stunned by the economic disparity in society.

The world is full of rich kids!

Since it was a decent national university, there were many wealthy people around, and I proudly thought that if there were a 'poverty championship' at this university, I would win the gold medal by an overwhelming margin over second place (though it's not something to be proud of).

I always looked at those around me as if I were looking at rare animals.

That beef inhabited the dining table. That among commoners, there were people who spread butter, not margarine, on their bread. That cup noodles were emergency food.

Every time I observed the lifestyle of the wealthy, I never stopped making new discoveries.

Although I was living an extremely impoverished student life, trying to survive like a creature in the savanna, strangely enough, I never felt any jealousy or inferiority toward those around me.

Those are emotions that sprout when someone you consider your equal turns out to be better than you, but if you consider everyone around you to be superior from the start, jealousy and inferiority never arise. It is the same reason why ordinary people do not feel jealousy or inferiority toward Arab oil kings.

Therefore, being as carefree as my mother, I never took that situation too seriously.

I won a tuition waiver, and covered almost all of my living expenses through part-time jobs and scholarships. I managed to fund my study abroad in Germany, driving school fees, and graduation trip expenses all on my own, and after successfully surviving for four years, I graduated. Looking back now, I think I had a fulfilling college life despite having no money.

My husband, who comes from a normal family, calls me a survivor because my family had so little money, but it was a home overflowing with smiles.

"We don't have any money. But, we'll manage somehow."

Because she would say that and laugh so nonchalantly, I never felt servile about not having money, and I have never once given up on anything because of a lack of money.

The motto of such a mother, whose own motto was "Que Sera, Sera," is

"Hold out both hands and say thank you."

That is it.

This means that whenever you receive something from someone, you must always hold out both hands and say thank you.

Why hold out both hands?

It means to "receive with care."

But actually, there is a hidden meaning beyond that.

It is to "not be shy about what you can receive, and take as much as you can, enough to pile up high in both hands."

My mother's motto is actually a bit greedy.

This applies not only to "things," but also to the "words" and "actions" of others.

If someone praises you,
"Thank you."

When someone helps you,
"Thank you."

I was taught to always express gratitude while receiving it carefully with both hands.

At first glance, it seems simple, but in a world where humility and self-sacrifice are often considered virtues, putting this into practice is actually quite difficult.

"You look beautiful."

If you were complimented like that,

"Thank you."

Could you say that?

"Would you like some help?"

If you were asked that,

"Thank you."

Could you say that?

Many people

"That's not true."
"I'm fine."

Don't you think they would deny it or turn it down like that?

If you are one of those people, I would like you to try holding out both hands and saying "thank you" just once.

I, for one,

When asked, "Do you want this?"
"Are you sure? Thank you so much! ♡"

When told, "You're cute."
"Thank you (with a beaming smile)."

When asked, "Is there anything you're struggling with?"
"Thank you. I'm actually having trouble with..."

In this way, though I had no money, in a sense, I have made my way through the world with exceptional charm.

It is because I have been supported by so many people in that way that I am who I am today.

If we can honestly and politely accept someone's goodwill, warm words, and the hands they extend to us, the world will look much kinder.

To be able to say "thank you" for casual, small acts of kindness.

That is surely a very important thing in life.

I am proud of my mother for teaching me such a wonderful thing.

I want to pass this motto on to my own daughters as well.

Of course, including the greedy meaning behind it, too.

I have participated in this project this time!

Thank you for the wonderful project! ❤️