The 'Must-Do' Mindset Drove Learning Away

As I have mentioned before,

I was terrible at Japanese literature when I was a child.

Fortunately, I was good at arithmetic and mathematics,

as well as English grammar, translation, and composition.

It was about 30 years ago,

but in the National Center Test at the time,

I considered it acceptable to get 60% in Japanese,

and aimed for 100% in other subjects.

If I could do that, I would reach 90% overall—

that was how I studied.

In other words,

ever since I was preparing for junior high school entrance exams,

I never really studied Japanese properly.

For regular exams,

I would memorize classical Japanese and Chinese literature,

to compensate for my inability to handle modern Japanese texts.

I just managed to get by with stopgap measures.

Due to financial circumstances as well,

my only option was a public university.

Furthermore, considering my strong subjects, I chose the science track.

I had hardly ever considered

any other options.

The reason I aspired to a career in healthcare

was not just this,

but at the very least, the option of pursuing

a liberal arts path never existed from the start.

However,

since I started raising children,

my way of thinking has gradually changed.

Subjects other than arithmetic

are surprisingly interesting.

As for arithmetic,

lately the problem statements have become pointlessly long,

and there are few new discoveries for me,

so I sometimes find it boring instead.

Social studies,

has different content from when I was learning it,

and it is fresh and fun.

And surprisingly,

reading Japanese language passages is also,

I have come to enjoy it now.

Now, I think back on it.

By thinking that I 'must be able to do it,'

the text didn't sink in at all.

Even after completing the problems, my grades didn't improve.

I felt impatient.

I understood even less.

In that vicious cycle,

the conclusion I reached was

to give up on Japanese literature.

But in reality,

there are many texts that are fun to read.

If, when I was a child,

I had encountered that joy—

the range of my career options

would have certainly expanded,

I sometimes think.

For the children of the future,

I hope that education which makes them strongly conscious of 'weak subjects'

will gradually decrease.

Before finding the joy

that exists within learning,

so that you do not close off your own possibilities.