It is precisely because I 'cannot' that I can turn 'I can do this!' into my own strength

I had something happy happen recently.

That is, actress and MC Yuki Terada personally requested me for a conversation!! Ta-da!

Although I had known about Ms. Terada for a while, I never expected the offer to come to me, so I was like, 'What is going on!?'

As for the background, since Ms. Terada was releasing a new book about 'how to speak,' she needed to film videos for Amazon and Rakuten pre-order bonuses, and it seems she set her sights on me because I had published books on 'how to listen' and 'how to write' with the same publisher.

Can you believe that? It pays to keep living.

I am an interview writer, and Ms. Terada is an MC. Since we both have 'listening jobs,' we obviously have things in common, but we also have differences in our fundamental ways of thinking, so it was incredibly interesting to talk with her.

But you know, among the many tips, what left the biggest impression on me was the overwhelming 'ease of speaking' I felt when I was in front of Ms. Terada.

Her expressions changed constantly with a smile, she was incredibly charming, her reactions were great, and I almost got greedy and thought, 'Oh, I want to keep listening to her talk forever.'

I am an interview writer too, so I should be able to 'listen' reasonably well, but because Ms. Terada provided such rhythmic nods and questions, I was troubled by a state where 'I wanted to focus on Ms. Terada, but it was so comfortable that I couldn't.'

What is the secret to this comfort?

I was curious about that, so I asked her on a Space I held after the video recording. Then Ms. Terada said:

That she puts her life into her nods and reactions.

I was quite shocked that she approaches it at a level of 'putting her life into it,' but when I heard her story, it turns out Ms. Terada isn't actually good at speaking to begin with. Indeed, even during the Space, there were moments where she seemed to be thinking deeply or couldn't quite find the right words.

But, 'because' she is not good at speaking, she puts all her effort into things like nods that make the other person want to talk more, opening her eyes wide, and using gestures for reactions.

She shared many other tips unique to Ms. Terada, such as 'digging into the details rather than the big picture to take an interest in the other person' or 'asking questions that can be answered with verbs rather than nouns,' but I thought that if you trace them all back to the source, they all lead to 'not being good at speaking.'

What we are 'able to do' now might be a survival strategy resulting from thinking about how to cover up our 'weaknesses.'

In fact, the reason I can 'write' is because I was bad at socializing, and the reason I can 'listen' is because I was bad at speaking.

Because we are 'bad' at something, we try to find ways to live while avoiding it, or look for something that can substitute for it, and while going through trial and error, we find a rough gem that says 'maybe I can do this,' and we polish it desperately.

In the end, 'weaknesses' might be the clues to finding 'I can do this!' Wow! There is nothing but potential here!!!

Anyway, Ms. Terada's new book 'How to Speak to Change Yourself' is finally being released.

As a bonus, Amazon comes with a 'dialogue video about listening and speaking,' and Rakuten comes with a 'dialogue video about career theory.' Please be sure to check them out!

I'm sure you'll definitely understand what I mean by Terada-san's 'comfort' once you watch the video (laughs).

Also, although it's slightly off-topic, I want to become a cute and charming adult like Terada-san.

I think the aura of 'this person is easy to talk to!' really comes from one's mindset. Thinking about it that way, 'listening' is truly profound. I want to become able to listen to various people's stories from more diverse perspectives!