Collaboration cafes for Heisei-era girls need to offer healthy menu options

I've been feeling firsthand lately that Heisei-era girls are being targeted.

I get Sailor Moon or Cardcaptor Sakura, but seriously, stop with Kirarin Revolution or Shugo Chara, okay??? It hits too close to home and I end up spending money on it.

So, this time, I went to the Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch cafe, which I absolutely adore.

I'm telling you now, I don't think anyone but an otaku will relate to this, so if you're a normie, just skip this!

Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch is a manga that was serialized in Nakayoshi.It was a huge hit and was adapted into an anime and games. This was back when I was in elementary school.

And, to tell you how much I love Pichi Pichi Pitch, I can sing all the opening, ending, and character songs.

Pichi Pichi Pitch is the kind of girl's anime where they sing songs to make their enemies suffer and defeat them, so naturally, a lot of songs were released. All of those songs were so good that I spent every week trying my hardest to memorize them. I even wrote them down in notebooks.

That said, I was just a girl back then. I didn't have money to spend on content, so I had to settle for the freebies that came with Nakayoshi.

Ugh, I wanted a microphone so bad. I also wanted that toy that blew bubbles when you spun it, and a music box too!!

However, I am a full-grown adult now. I don't have an abundance of money, but I can afford to spend a little. Well, that's exactly why I'm being targeted, I suppose.

So, I headed to the cafe in high spirits, but look at this objectively. This mountain of a strawberry milk drink. There's no way a woman in her late twenties can drink this. I'd die of heartburn. I really wish they'd be more considerate about that. My heart is that of a girl, but my body is that of a woman in her late twenties.

Pancakes, pasta, and strawberry milk. I mean, it's fine, but we just can't finish it all. Tofu hamburger steaks, brown rice flakes, or soy lattes might be better.

I'm sorry to be so demanding, but since the target audience's bodies aren't those of little girls, I think everyone would be happier with a healthier menu. *Burp.*

After the cafe, I went to karaoke and successfully became a little girl again. Pichi Pichi Pitch really has so many god-tier songs, so I hope you all listen to them if you get the chance. They're on YouTube Music.

Singing the character songs brings back memories of when I was a girl.

Back then, I lived my life relying on Pichi Pichi Pitch songs. I used to burn CDs and give them to my friends. I used to copy the drawings. That's how immeasurable the influence of girl's anime on girls is.

I think there are some girls whose tastes were warped by Pichi Pichi Pitch, with songs that sound like requiems reminiscent of visual-kei music, or songs sung by beautiful sisters with ecstatic expressions. The person I went with said, “This is what got me into ALI PROJECT.” I totally get that.

And so, while saying things like, "Wait, hold on, isn't these lyrics just too good?", we spent two hours singing nothing but Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch songs.

Girls' anime is dangerous. It has an unfathomable charm. It possesses an irresistible power that makes us, who once had neither wealth nor power, loosen our purse strings, thinking, "Maybe I can afford this now."

That is precisely why.I want merchandise that adults can actually wear. I want food that won't give adults heartburn.That's the kind of thing I'm asking for!!!

I love girls' anime!!!! The end!!!