The day I had ringing in my ears, heart palpitations, and a hard time during a live stream

When I first started live streaming, I think I was just all over the place.

I didn't know how to do it,

I wanted to look here, I wanted to look there, and people who just arrived would say, 'I want to see what you were doing earlier!'

I wanted to respond to everything and tried my best, but then the stream wouldn't progress at all.

But if I didn't move things along, the people waiting would get bored.

I'm the type of person who really picks up on the atmosphere from the comments,

'Are they a bit annoyed right now?'
'Are they bored?'

I would imagine things like that and get more and more anxious.

Then one day, this comment came in during a live stream.

'I wish you'd stop saying you can't do something when you said you could.'

In that moment, I suddenly had ringing in my ears, my heart started pounding, and I felt distressed.

In the end, it turned out it wasn't directed at me, but rather that another streamer was doing that, so they meant they didn't want them to do it.

But at the time, I was streaming so desperately that,

I'm being blamed.

I thought that, and my mind went completely blank.

And at that exact moment, my child started talking to me too.

I told them to be quiet because I was live, and I think I probably had a terrible look on my face where they couldn't see me. lol

Live streaming is just an exchange of comments, so you can't really read emotions properly.

Conversely, I might be hurting someone with my own words.

When I thought about that, I became afraid to do my next live stream.

I think I even talked to the doctor about how I was scared of performing live.

But even then, it was the audience who supported me.

"You should just do what you want to do, Mei-chan."

They told me that.

I was truly happy.

Since my live shows are often during the day, everyone comes to see them during their busy schedules.

That is precisely why I thought about how to make them easier to watch and how to present them efficiently, which led to the current format.
Even now, I get nervous before a show, and sometimes a single comment can get me down. Haha
But those words the audience said to me back then,
"You should just do what you want to do, Mei-chan,"
I am still supported by those words today.