You don't know yourself best!
Hello, this is Matchi.
This time, I'm talking about things I changed after switching jobs!
I successfully changed jobs and advanced my career, but if I stay like this, I won't change.
I'll just repeat the same "Matchi-hara" (Matchi-harassment) again. (Sweat)
So, I thought about why I end up committing "Matchi-hara".
Why do I treat others harshly? → Because I am frustrated.
Why am I frustrated? → Because things aren't going the way I thought they would.
Why aren't they going that way? → Because I haven't explained things properly to the other person.
Why can't I explain things? → Because I don't understand the other person's position or situation.
Why can't I understand? → Because I lack consideration for the other person.
Why can't I show consideration? →
Because I look down on others
Why do I look down on them? → Because I want to maintain my superiority.
Why do I want to be in a superior position? →
Because I lack self-confidence
I analyzed it like that. Among these, the parts
・Because I look down on others ・Because I lack self-confidence were
words that cut to the heart for me.
So I thought that if I could do something about these two things, I might be able to change.
First, because I look down on others. How can I improve this? According to the 'why-why' analysis, it should be solved by
gaining self-confidence, but confidence doesn't come easily, and besides, at that time, I thought I was full of confidence, so it was a difficult situation.
So I decided to start with appearances.
"Use polite language (keigo) with everyone"!
I had a tendency to be harsh, especially toward younger people and juniors, so I thought I would start by stopping the use of casual language. Also, I saw many people I respect speaking with polite language to everyone without distinction, and I thought that was cool, so I'm imitating them.
Time to put it into practice! Whether they were high school students or elderly people, I made sure to use polite language with everyone. I think I wouldn't have been able to change my lifestyle without a major change like switching jobs, so it was a very good opportunity in my life.
As for the effect, it was outstanding! People get a gentle impression of me, and they also trust me.
Above all, it allows me to take a breath, so I can choose my words carefully when speaking to others.
By doing this, I can calm down, and I no longer resort to verbal abuse.
That said, my original way of thinking is hard to change, so I think there were still times when I came across as sarcastic (laughs).
You can't do everything perfectly, can you...
But personally, I consider it a very positive change.
One thing I'll say, to be a bit blunt, is that because I use polite language with everyone, some people occasionally misunderstand. This is especially common with younger people who have less life experience; when the relationship becomes one where they use casual language while I use polite language, some people start to look down on me.
For those people, I just mutter "you brat" in my heart and try to distance myself from them. Everyone has their own right answer, so I quietly walk away to avoid forcing my own answer on them.
If you ever find yourself wondering why you're being so harsh, trying to pause and rephrase your thoughts into polite language might help, so please give it a try.
Next, I'd like to write about changes in the heart!
Please be sure to read it.
And please like, comment, and follow!
I don't even know myself the best!
Thank you for reading this far!
See you again!