Learning the Distance Between Us

Day 7

After the honesty of the previous day, our conversations felt noticeably lighter.

There was no awkwardness left between us. Instead, we settled into something that felt natural. We greeted each other throughout the day, talked about whatever came to mind, and slowly began learning the small details that make up another person's world.

One moment, however, stayed with me.

Curious about Japanese culture, I asked if I could use the honorific "-chan." I knew it was common in Japan, but I didn't fully understand what it meant or when it was appropriate.

She patiently explained the differences between -san, -chan, and -kun, describing how each reflected a different level of familiarity and respect. Then she shared something even more meaningful.

She told me that -chan was reserved for people who were very close to her—family and close friends. Since we had only recently met, it felt too personal. For now, she preferred that I simply call her by her name. Maybe, she said, that would change naturally as we got to know each other better.

There was no offense in her words. It wasn't a rejection.

It was simply an honest explanation of her boundaries.

I respected that immediately.

Looking back, I appreciate that conversation because it taught me something beyond Japanese honorifics. It reminded me that closeness isn't something you claim; it's something that develops over time. Respect comes first.

The rest of the day unfolded in the easy rhythm we were beginning to establish.

We talked about her novel on Note, and I promised to read the earlier chapters after realizing I had been looking at them in reverse order. We both laughed at the misunderstanding.

She mentioned that Episode 6 would be published later that evening and thanked me for supporting her work. I had also finished another chapter of my own memoir and shared it with her before finally attempting—for what felt like the third time—to go to sleep.

Our conversations drifted through ordinary moments.

We wished each other good morning and good night more than once because of the time difference. We talked about meals, the summer heat, and staying hydrated. She mentioned that work was busy because of a photoshoot, so she hadn't had time to read my article yet, but she assured me she would when things settled down.

There was nothing extraordinary about any of it.

Yet those ordinary exchanges were becoming something I looked forward to each day.

Without realizing it, we had started building a routine.

Not through grand conversations or dramatic moments, but through small messages exchanged across countries, different time zones, and busy schedules.

Sometimes, friendships don't grow because of the big conversations.

Sometimes they grow because two people simply keep showing up.