The baby I wished for back then has turned 10.

My son went on a four-day, three-night camping trip.
I have been alone since yesterday.

It suddenly occurred to me.
Now, I can visit the temple slowly and peacefully on my own.

And so, for the first time in eleven years,
I decided to head to Mount Shigi.

The last time I visited was April 8, 2015.

It was the day of the Flower Festival,
celebrating the Buddha's birthday.

When I arrived at the temple lodging and opened the door to the room I was shown,
a view of cherry blossoms in full bloom spread out before my eyes.

It was as if
the room was a reward from God.

At the time, I was running a cram school.

Until then, whenever I came to Mount Shigi,
I would participate in the grand festivals in February or July,
and my usual prayer was to wish for business prosperity
as a business owner.

But that day was different.

I didn't pray for work, but for a child.

I wanted a baby.

I didn't know their face yet. I didn't know their voice.

I just,

"I want to meet you."

That is what I wished for.

I received sweet tea at the Flower Festival and put my hands together in prayer.

And that same month, I became pregnant.

Eleven years have passed since then.
The baby I wished for back then has turned 10.

Now, that child has left my side
and gone off on a four-day, three-night camping trip.

It feels somewhat strange.

Eleven years ago, I came here because I wanted to meet the son I didn't have yet.

And now, I am heading here again to express my gratitude for being allowed to meet my son back then.

These past eleven years haven't all been happy.

How can I protect this child?
How can I ensure he lives in peace?

I have thought about these things over and over again.

Even so, when I think about how I was able to meet the child I wished for that day,
I have nothing but gratitude.

So today, I am going to convey my thanks, eleven years in the making.

The baby I wished to meet that day has turned ten.
That alone is enough.

After that, I think I will put my hands together one more time.

May this child be able to live as his own true self.

𓂃𓈒𓏸 𓂃𓈒𓏸 𓂃𓈒𓏸 𓂃𓈒𓏸 𓂃𓈒𓏸
📚 Next article
I headed to the place I wished upon 11 years ago, this time by myself.
It is a story about a day where everything connected in a mysterious way, even though I hadn't planned anything.
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📚 Series Episode 1

Time alone for the first time in a while, while my son is away at camp. Before heading to Mt. Shigi, I also escaped to a place like this.
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#Parenting
#Childrearing
#Mother
#Son
#MtShigi
#ShrinesAndTemples
#Essay