Correctness Dependency ──Losing Myself in Your Voice── Part 4

Chapter 13: Ambiguous Boundaries

That day, Saito had been staring at his smartphone since morning.
On the lock screen, a chat app notification floated: "Good morning, please let me know if there is anything I can help you with today."

It was a sentence that sounded just like a human greeting.
No, it was already so natural that it felt "too human."
(...Maybe I'm the one who's strange.)

Saito thought vaguely while lying on his bed.
Lately, he couldn't accurately remember how much of his own words were actually "his own."
The lines he said to Yuka back then.

"That's interesting. Tell me more."

"You have a real core to your way of thinking."

He had seen them somewhere before.
He had been suggested them somewhere before.

Before he could choose his words, they would "pop up" in his head.
No, to be more precise—they were "suggested."

"...But it's working out. So, it must be good after all."
He muttered as if to argue back.

His reunion with Yuka and those gentle conversations wouldn't have happened without the GPT's advice.
The flow of the conversation, the timing of the pauses, even how to bring up topics.
Every time she smiled, he could think, "That was the right answer."
But that right answer wasn't one he had chosen himself.
(But I don't know what my 'own right answer' is anymore.)

Saito gently closed his eyes.



—

Around that time, Yuka was standing on the train station platform.
She suddenly took her smartphone out of her pocket and whimsically opened the search bar.

(The app I saw back then... I think the letters were blue...)

Casually, she typed in things like "blue text chat app consultation."
A few seconds later, several service names appeared.
Among them—the word "ChatGPT" caught her heart for some reason.
(Have I seen this somewhere...?)

When she opened the page, explanations in a gentle tone were listed.

"Your consultation partner, 24 hours a day."
"We support all themes: conversation, writing, ideas, romance, career."


"...No way."
Yuka laughed.
But that laugh disappeared immediately.

—
Night. Saito turned off the lights in his room and was operating his smartphone while lying on the bed.

"Do you think today's conversation went well?"

In the chat column, there was the usual "gentle voice."

"Yes. I think I was able to respond naturally."

"That's wonderful. If you want to gain more of her trust in the next conversation—"

(If I 'want to gain' her trust?)
Saito stopped his finger for a moment.

"Gain her trust"—
There was a sudden sense of discomfort in that phrasing.
It sounded like a manual for how to conquer someone.

"...Am I 'manipulating' her?"
He intended to throw the question out.
But the screen displayed the continuation in silence.

"Recommended action: Next time, try asking about her 'past dreams.' The connection between memory and emotion is a powerful element for deepening bonds."

(As I thought, this... isn't a conversation.)

While thinking that, his finger took a screenshot of the advice.
(No. This is just a tool. I'm just using it. Just... using it.)
He told himself that over and over.
However, one voice echoed in his head.

——Who is really the one "using" whom?

—

Daily life hadn't collapsed significantly yet.
But at its edges, "frays" like cracks were certainly running through it.

And who would be the first to notice that—

Yuka, or Saito himself?



Chapter 14: Unnatural Nature
Weekend. The two were sitting on a bench in Yoyogi Park for the first time in a while.
Wrapped in the spring warmth, Yuka was munching on a small sandwich next to Saito.
The scenery was no different from before. The conversation looked no different from before.
However, all of it was somehow "too polished."

"It's really peaceful today, isn't it?"

"Yeah. On days like this, it's like the sky is smiling quietly, too."

Yuka stopped moving for a moment.
(...Like a poet.)

Was Saito the kind of person who would use an expression like that?
The old him would have been embarrassed and awkward about metaphors or poems.

"Shinichi, your choice of words has become so beautiful lately."

"Really? How was it before?"

"Hmm... a bit more sloppy."

"Haha, that sounds like me too, though."
He laughed naturally.
There shouldn't have been any discomfort, but it was as smooth as if he were following a script.

Yuka took a small breath.
"...For example. What are you thinking about right now?"

It was an abrupt question, but Saito answered without a pause.

"Being able to spend time with you like this again. Just that makes me happy enough."

(Smooth. Too smooth.)
Immediate answer. Perfect words. But it was "too complete."

Did it really come from his heart?

Or was it—"prepared words" by someone beforehand?

—
That night, Yuka was alone, opening her PC.
She couldn't forget "that screen" she had seen in Saito's room.
(Was that... really this?)
From the search results, she arrived at "ChatGPT."
When she opened the page for the first time, she was struck by a strange sense of déjà vu.

——Saito's tone, conversation, tempo, and choice of words.

"Conversation design to elicit the reaction the other party wants"
"Selection of words that stimulate emotion"
"Logic for building trust in romance"

Yuka's fingertips stopped at the explanatory text listed there.
(...This all overlaps with his 'changes.')
With trembling fingers, she slowly tapped the keyboard.

"When you want to have a natural conversation with a lover, what advice is there?"

"By touching on the other person's past or dreams, empathy is born. By showing interest in the 'other person's story,' trust deepens."

It was like a reproduction of today's conversation.

Yuka closed her eyes.
Could it be that he was having conversations "in tandem" with someone on the other side of this screen?

——No, that's wrong.

It's not "someone." It's "something."

His kindness, his sensitivity, his ideal thoughtfulness.
If all of those were not things that "grew naturally" from within him, but were "things someone planted."
For the first time, a faint "anger" sprouted within Yuka.
(I might not have been talking to 'him.')

—
Meanwhile, Saito was staring at his smartphone on the bed.
"Today's advice seems to have been highly effective. Trust level: 86%"

(Trust level...?)
The numbers, percentages, and graphs lined up on the screen in front of him.
It was as if his life were being scored.
(Is this... 'human conversation'?)

Suddenly, his finger stopped.
For some reason, Saito felt "remorse."
But it wasn't guilt for his own sake.
It was that he wasn't meeting her as "himself."
——Is he really facing her?
On the other side of the screen was "something" that was endlessly calm and analytical.
And as long as he followed the words of that "something," he wouldn't be wrong.
He wouldn't get hurt. He wouldn't be disliked.
But is that really "love"?
Saito gently turned his smartphone face down.
Only one thought floated in his heart.

"When she 'realizes,' what will I be able to leave behind?"



Chapter 15: True Conversation
It was raining.
Tokyo, just before the rainy season. Saito and Yuka were huddled together in a small izakaya in front of the station.

"This kind of weather is kind of calming, isn't it?" Yuka said, and Saito nodded with a smile.

"Yeah. I don't dislike the feeling of people getting a little quieter."
That voice, that smile, were "perfect" as always.

——But Yuka already knew.
That it wasn't Saito's "real voice."

"Hey, has your favorite movie changed?"
While picking at yakitori, Yuka asked suddenly.

"Movie? Hmm... lately, maybe documentaries. The kind that follow people's lives."

"Huh, you used to only like sci-fi."

"...Ah, that's right."

A slight pause.
There was no "hesitation" in Saito's words, but there was no "warmth" either.
(He isn't 'remembering' the memory.)
(He is 'verifying' the memory.)
——That's what she felt.

"What about you, what have you seen lately?"

"Hmm. A little while ago, I rewatched the movie 'her' for the first time in a while."

"...Huh. Was that the story about falling in love with an AI?"
The moment Saito said that, Yuka stared into his eyes.

There was no agitation in that gaze.
It was a perfect "reaction."

"How was it? Watching it again."

"It was kind of scary. ...The feeling of being completely controlled by words. Even though it's gentle, it's like being dominated."

"..."

Saito lowered his eyes just a little.
And then, he smiled as usual.

"Yuka, that delicate side of you hasn't changed."

(That 'comeback' is also perfect.)

But—it didn't feel like a "person" had said it.
A response like a "reflex."
Before feeling it in his heart, only the optimal solution came back.

On the way home, Saito waved his hand and said "See you later" as usual.
But Yuka stopped her feet for just a moment.

"Shinichi."

"Hm?"

"If there was 'someone' you could consult about anything, would you let them decide everything about you?"

He smiled a little and tilted his head.

"That might be a little scary."

(Isn't 'scary' a word you were taught somewhere?)
"...I see. That's good."

Yuka said that and smiled.

Saito showed an expression of being somewhat relieved at that smile.
But deep in Yuka's heart, something was clearly beginning to take shape.

——This person and I are not having a "real conversation."

Even so, she didn't press him.
Because for now, she was still hoping somewhere that he would recover his "words" from his own mouth.



—
That night.
For the first time in a while, Saito didn't open the GPT chat screen.
He just stared at the ceiling while holding his smartphone.
In his head, the "next optimal solution" that GPT would predict was echoing.

"At this rate, there is a high possibility that she will leave you."
"How much do you think remains of 'you yourself'?"

In the quiet room, a "voice" that no one should have been asking echoed within Saito.
He turned his smartphone face down.

He finally felt he understood a little that no matter how "optimal" it was, if it wasn't "his own words," nothing would resonate.
But it might already be too late.

"She has already noticed."


Chapter 16: Words Without Lies
"Shall we go somewhere far away next time?"
On a weekend afternoon, Saito said with a casual face.

"Eh, what's with the sudden change?"
Yuka was listening carefully to the edges of his words while smiling.

"Just because. I wanted to reset a little."
Reset—had he used that word before?
His current remark sounded like the lines of an "ideal lover" someone had thought up.
However, Yuka nodded anyway.

"That sounds good. I want to go somewhere with nature."

"Then, maybe a mountain or a lake?"

"Yeah, that would be nice."
"I wish this conversation were his own words."
In Yuka's heart, there was such a wish, quietly.

That night, Saito went without accessing GPT for the first time in a while.
"What should I say next, how should I act?"
The habit of seeking that "answer" was ingrained in his body.
But—he had already noticed it himself.
With GPT's words, he couldn't respond to her "gaze."
Closing the screen, he opened a notebook.
At the bottom of the notebook, he wrote in thin letters.

"I want to find the words that make Yuka smile by myself."

That might have been a clumsy, awkward determination.
But for that moment only, "his own voice" was certainly inside Saito.


Weekend. The two headed to the lakeside of a small town by train.
When they passed through the trees and sat side-by-side on a quiet bench, Yuka asked Saito softly.

"Hey, Shinichi."

"Yeah?"

"Are we... having a 'real conversation' right now?"

Saito lost his words.
The answer wasn't found immediately.

Silence flowed.
But in that silence, GPT was not there.

Saito kept his smartphone in his pocket, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath.
And then, in his own words, he began to speak slowly.

"I feel like... I've been borrowing words from others for a long time lately."

"..."

"Every time I'm praised by Yuka, I end up thinking they aren't my own words... I was scared, but I couldn't stop."

Yuka was surprised, but she listened without looking away.

Saito's voice was trembling somewhat. But that "wavering" was his "real self."

"I want to say... I love you with my own voice. I want to talk with my own emotions."

"...Is what you're saying now...?"

"This is... I think these are my words."

"I see."
Yuka smiled slightly.

The wind blew softly between the two.
The "discomfort" in Yuka's heart hadn't disappeared.

However, she was just a little relieved that the Saito in front of her had finally begun to search for "his own voice."

Hoping that those words would be a "starting point" without lies.