Self-Centered vs. Other-Centered: You Can Decide Everything Yourself

This is Nene.
Autumn is deepening, and I have a feeling winter is just around the corner.
Thank you for visiting again today (o^―^o)

The table of contents is as follows

1. These were the results of my observations.

[Differences between people who are other-centered and self-centered]

I observed the differences between being other-centered and self-centered. This is strictly my personal and experiential opinion

gained from watching people around me for about a month!
It's hard to tell with people you meet for the first time,
but if you see people in a familiar place multiple times,
I think you can observe, "Which axis does this person lean toward more?"
I observed it for the first time (lol).
Please understand that I am not always observing people.

▶ Self-centered people are focused on themselves.
They rarely criticize others and often speak about their own impressions and the "facts" of what they have seen or heard.
Even when working, they don't unnecessarily follow others and seem to enjoy ambiguity. To put it nicely, I got the impression they were dry.

▶ Other-centered people seem to be constantly looking around, following people with their eyes, or chasing after people and voices. They don't seem focused on themselves.
What is characteristic is that when they talk, I felt a pressure that they wanted to give their opinion to others rather than talk about themselves.

2. I lean toward being other-centered

[Living while leaning toward being other-centered is, after all, painful]

I live overwhelmingly in an other-centered way. Because I live this way, I accumulated stress and reached the bottom of my life 1 year and 8 months ago.
It was a painful day, and for the first time in my life, I felt a sense of despair as if my life were coming to an end.

I don't think being other-centered itself is a bad thing.
The problem is becoming too other-centered, and I learned that it has an aspect of "self-destruction" where you end up attacking yourself.

They all apply to me!
I am someone who easily causes discord when interacting with others. I was told in a developmental assessment that I have certain traits, but I personally feel that this other-centeredness has a major influence.

[The products of being other-centered]

Being swept away by those around me and unable to put my own thoughts into words.
Lacking concrete actions and problem-solving skills regarding matters.

The two points above are products created because I am too other-centered.
These products have gradually accumulated and started to affect my daily life.

When I suppress my own thoughts, I negate what I am suppressing and feel for a moment that "it's easier to go along with the opinions of those around me." However, because I am bottling up my true feelings, my heart is always cloudy and my head is buzzing.
I end up lying to myself.

When I conform too much to the opinions of others, I don't want to take responsibility myself.
And then, at some point, my life came to a sudden stop.

3. Use self-centeredness as a spice!

It is fine for there to be all kinds of people.
However, if you suppress your true feelings too much and grow up unable to put them into words, it is undeniable that a sense of "difficulty in living" will arise.

What kind of person are you, and what do you value?
How much should you share about yourself, and how do you want to live?
You can decide everything yourself. I feel that by changing how I perceive things with this perspective, I can alleviate my own "difficulty in living," and I am still working on self-improvement even now 🤔

This time, I was able to secretly make observations that are also useful to me, and I was able to record them on note, so my happiness is doubled (o^―^o) smile

Thank you very much for reading until the end♪