What emerges when you succumb to anxiety and fear

These are the charismatic figures and bibles I mentioned last month.

In other words, they are the embodiment of 'want' born from the anxiety and fear of 'not having' something in your current self.

Why do you want them so much?
Because by creating a proxy to efficiently suppress negative emotions—such as not being able to believe in yourself or hating yourself—you can (at least slightly) calm your unstable mental state.

Even if your self-esteem is boosted in this way, it is merely the flip side of self-denial; in other words, you are just performing as a cardboard cutout of yourself.

Experiencing that way of life can later be sublimated into learning.
However, if you just grow older without learning and end up falling ill and dying, I think that is a truly wasteful way to spend your time.

Through my interactions with various people, I have become able to tell (to a certain extent) if someone might be that type of person.
The key point for identifying this is the movement of their 'eyes'.

No matter how well you manipulate your words, your eyes cannot lie.
If you can naturally lie with your eyes as well, that would qualify you as a psychopath, but if the eye movements do not match the words being used, I will not trust you, no matter how beautiful your words may be.

'Are their eyes darting around?' 'Are their eyes bloodshot?'
Reading the movements of the emotions that dwell in the eyes is also one of the important skills for surviving complex human relationships strongly and flexibly.

That is how I perceive it.

That said, I do not assert that this 'idolatry of what one lacks' is a bad thing or a mistake.
In a stress-filled society, emotional support is necessary, and it is natural to need it.

I understand that if you do so with a healthy sense of purpose, such as personal growth or making someone happy, that is perfectly fine.

In summary, can you forgive yourself for having negative emotions like anxiety and fear?
The internal conflict that arises from that is painful, but by fully feeling those emotions, you can achieve self-understanding and self-acceptance.

Whether or not this can be achieved is another matter, but the possibility exists for everyone. Based on my own experience, I can say that with certainty.