Six months since I started writing on note

Since I started writing on note this May

I have come to feel many things. First of all,
I feel my own recklessness the most right now,
and it is just one thing after another that surprises me.

Looking back at my notes,
I have to be careful because I have typos.
From the name Akimi Watase,
which was the same since my Twitter days,

to changing it to my real name, Akie,

or renaming my image character to Akie,

I decided on these things with intuition without thinking too deeply.
The content of what I write is also mostly
just me writing down honestly and directly what pops into my head at that moment.

This is often the case with works that are
just Akie as she is.

Articles where I have stored up my own stress... drafts I kept aside

I have started to try to be careful to write my note articles in a way that won't be misunderstood as much as possible... but...
I also wonder if it's possible to do that for everything.

It was a good lesson that not everything is just fun. I have also lived my married life thinking it was mostly painful.

When I say it's painful when it's painful, it becomes even more agonizing and I can't do anything...

I've developed a habit of acting like I'm having fun to get through things, and I wonder about that,
I've struggled with that contradiction,
I've gained confidence by somehow overcoming it,
and I've managed to scrape by until now.

Anniversary introductions because I want to keep writing happily,
heartwarming diaries, essay collections,
and letters of appreciation to everyone.

Thank you, Kenta-san...

But anymore,
to the point where it's impossible to manage,
even in such a real world,
ever since I was driven into a corner.

I encountered note and the fun of writing,
and while facing the joy and the difficulty,

I am grateful now that I have been able to continue this far.

Supported by many people and read by them,
I have been able to continue for six months.

To all my Ru-chan friends, Ta-chan, Hikarun,
thank you all so very much.

Even though we have no connection,
to my followers, thank you so much.

Painful things in real life that I can't do anything about,
I feel like I want to run away every single day in a row.
But that is probably something everyone has...
In the end, it's not just me.
Even so, the warmth of the fact that there are people watching just because I am writing like this.

I am grateful.
It has been a series of truly painful things until now.

It hasn't stopped,
and it continues even now.
Perhaps it may never end.

Even so, I want to live without giving up on myself until the end.
To all my Ru-chan friends, thank you.

Because it represents the day I can surely enjoy the swamp of note.

Thank you for viewing and reading
until the end.

by Akie