Things I Was Conscious Of During Childbirth Attendance

Good morning. This is Kazu-run.

I am grateful that I was able to be present for the birth!
Honestly, there isn't much you can do...
You might get angry at me for saying this, but honestly, that was the case...

It was different from the image I had in my head

It is different from the image of childbirth I had imagined.
I was only at the hospital for about an hour and a half before the baby was born, and by the time I arrived, my wife was already in the delivery room.

I had imagined being there for eight hours or so before the birth. I thought I would spend time together in the labor room fighting the pain, and perhaps help ease the pain with a tennis ball or something similar.
The idea is that once the cervix opens, you move to the delivery room to be by her side for the birth.

Since I arrived directly at the delivery room, the midwife was already there, and I just followed the midwife's instructions.
All I could do was give her drinks and turn on the electric fan...

Here is what I was conscious of!

1. Do not speak more than necessary

I thought she might find it annoying if I talked too much...
But if I didn't do anything, I worried she would wonder why I was even there...

It was a tug-of-war between these two feelings, haha.

So, I said "Hang in there" when she looked like she was struggling or when she was pushing.
Also, I repeated the words the midwife said. I didn't know what to say, so I figured that wouldn't be wrong.

2. Focus on my wife's condition

When she seemed thirsty and looked like she had the capacity to drink water,
When she looked hot and I could adjust her collar or similar,

I spoke to her during these two times.
Also, since talking might be exhausting for her, I asked questions that could be answered with a yes or no.

She is the type who doesn't like fan air blowing directly on her, so I made sure never to aim it at her face.
I made sure the air blew gently around her neck.
I thought she might be sensitive to things like the airflow, so I made fine adjustments, haha.

3. Make her feel the comfort of having me by her side

Above all, I didn't want to get in the way or be thought of as annoying,
but I also didn't want her to think I wasn't doing anything.

After thinking about it a lot, I decided to place my hand on her shoulder to let her feel that she wasn't alone.
I thought about holding her hand, but there were bars on the bed for her to grip to push, and she was holding onto those the whole time.

I haven't asked if placing my hand on her shoulder was the right thing to do. But since she didn't get angry at me, I personally think it wasn't the wrong answer, haha.

Bonus

After the baby was actually born, I kept taking pictures. I was desperate to capture that moment.
However, I watched the moment of birth with my own eyes. I felt it would be strange to watch such a precious moment through a smartphone screen.

Also, please take lots of photos and show them to your wife. Your wife won't be able to move from her lying position for a while.
They place the baby near her face, but sometimes the baby's face is turned the other way, so she can't see well.
So, I took photos of the baby's face to show her, or took videos of the baby sneezing to show her.


I was thinking about all sorts of things while attending the birth. Wondering what I could do for my wife...
After thinking about it, I figured that even if my wife got angry at me, she would forgive me if I told her I had thought about it and acted that way, haha.

I was praying that she would be happy that I was thinking about her, haha.
Since men cannot understand the pain, there is a limit to what we can do, but I learned that it is important to think about your wife and act accordingly!

I hope this is helpful!