[Omnidirectional Thinking Technique Psychology] Wisdom Note (Ver.neo) Talking Conscious

─Talking Conscious─

Where is your consciousness in dialogue?

Here, we will look at your subjectivity toward the other person and the subjectivity of "yourself inferring what the other person is thinking."
In this section, you can notice and deal with your sensory preconceptions toward the other party. Surprisingly, even if the other person does not actually dislike you, you may have a fixed idea that "they must dislike me" due to your own misunderstanding. Fixed ideas and the like can be surprisingly significant obstacles to calm and objective logical construction.

[Seeing] Visual Subjectivity (12 Items)

01. First Impression
Notice the tendency for the first impression you form to dominate your overall evaluation. Observe whether you are projecting unconscious evaluations onto the other person's facial expressions or clothing.

02. Facial Expression Interpretation
Instead of simplistically interpreting smiles or blank expressions as "affirmation or negation," look at them while being conscious of the context behind the emotions.

03. Eye Contact Perception
Do not conclude that looking away is a rejection; consider possibilities such as concentration, nervousness, or consideration.

04. Posture Recognition
Detect your own emotional projections, such as "coercion," "confidence," or "anxiety," toward the other person's posture.

05. Distance Observation
Physical distance can reflect psychological distance. Be conscious of your own reactions to actions of approaching or moving away.

06. Gaze Distribution
Who you look at and for how long indicates the center of gravity of the relationship. Both staring too much and avoiding eye contact too much create intent.

07. Appearance Judgment
Observe whether you are judging the other person's personality based on their appearance or atmosphere. Check the initial values of your prejudices.

08. Environmental Influence
Be conscious of whether elements of the setting, such as light, sound, and the feeling of the air, are changing your impression of the other person.

09. Non-verbal Indication
When trying to read emotions from the other person's movements or gestures, check whether you are mixing in your own emotions.

10. Visual Expectation
Be careful that your hope of "it would be good if it looked like this" is not distorting your perception of reality.

11. Sense of Synchronization
Notice yourself naturally imitating the other person's gestures or expressions, and distinguish whether it is empathy or sycophancy.

12. Observational Stillness
By calming the consciousness that tries to see, you can notice aspects that were previously invisible.

[Speaking] Verbal Subjectivity (12 Items)

13. Speech Motivation
Confirm your own internal purpose for why you chose those words. See if it is assertion, approval, or fear.

14. Word Choice
Be aware of the differences in softness, severity, and sense of distance, and verify that your words are not leading your emotions.

15. Tone of Voice Awareness
Understand that the tone of your voice is a tool for conveying emotion, and intentionally stabilize it.

16. Speaking Speed
Speed indicates impatience, while slowness indicates caution. Understand that your state of mind is conveyed before the content of your message.

17. Self-Assertion
Distinguish whether your statement is meant to "convey" something or to "get your way."

18. Emotional Insertion
Recognize the temperature of the emotions you put into your words and imagine how the other person will receive them.

19. Speaking Agitation
Observe your own reaction when you receive a denial or counterargument. Check whether defense or correction is prevailing.

20. Conversation Leadership
Reflect on whether taking the lead has become an end in itself. Make the sharing of understanding your goal.

21. Responsibility for Speech
Understand that spoken words remain as a record, and treat them as the result of your thinking.

22. Organizing Logic
Structuring emotional opinions logically prevents misunderstandings. Logic is a shield to protect emotions.

23. Inducing Co-conversation
Observe whether your statements are directed toward involving the other person and creating a sense of security.

24. Awareness of Ending
Be aware of whether the timing of ending the conversation deprives the other person of their lingering thoughts. Silence is also a part of dialogue.

[Listening] Active Listening Subjectivity (12 items)

25. Preparation for Reception
Before listening to the other person, check whether your mind is in a state of readiness to accept.

26. Emotional Reaction
Observe the feelings of like or dislike that arise the moment you hear something, and become aware of your emotions before making a judgment.

27. Inferring Intent
When exploring the intent behind the other person's statement, be careful not to make arbitrary interpretations.

28. Tendency to Agree
Check whether you are just agreeing to gain a sense of security.

29. Tendency to Counter
Look at whether you are trying to maintain your ego by counterarguing.

30. Tuning Out
Notice whether you are unconsciously blocking out topics you cannot understand.

31. Empathic Understanding
Temporarily place the other person's emotions within yourself and understand them as if you were experiencing them.

32. Reading Between the Lines
Pay attention to the parts that were not put into words and read the meaning of the silence.

33. Converging Opinions
Summarize what you have heard and check the gap between the other person's intent and your understanding.

34. Emotional Resonance
Reflect on whether you have lost sight of yourself by resonating too much with the other person's emotions.

35. Memory Organization
Organize the information you hear and keep emotional information and factual information separate.

36. Acceptance of Silence
Respect silence not as "awkwardness" but as "time for thinking."

Start&Index