When is the best time to change jobs while raising children? The honest answer seen through career interviews with 2,000 working moms

[Estimated reading time: approx. 6 minutes]

Is there a "best time" to change jobs while raising children? As a nationally certified career consultant, I have worked in the human resources industry for over 10 years and have conducted career interviews for hundreds of mothers raising children. Based on that experience, I will give you the conclusion first. The timing for changing jobs while raising children is not determined by the age or month of the child. When you simultaneously feel that you have reached your limit and can no longer continue, and that you want to try something new, that is the time you should make a move.

In this article, I will share the realistic trends I have actually seen in interviews regarding the timing of changing jobs while raising children. This is not an idealistic theory, but a discussion based on the reality that you have to pick up your children and that they sometimes get sick and you have to take time off.

■ There is no "correct age" for the timing of changing jobs while raising children

I often hear theories about timing, such as "after getting used to daycare" or "after the older child enters elementary school." While these can certainly be guidelines, looking back at the people I have interviewed, the difference between those who were able to move at that time and those who were not was not the age of the children. The difference was whether the person felt they wanted to change their current situation.

There are people who started job hunting and found a way of working that suits them even when their child was one year old. Conversely, there are people who continue to maintain the status quo even when their child is in the upper grades of elementary school. If you try to judge the timing of changing jobs while raising children solely by age, you will often end up procrastinating, thinking, "I'll wait a little longer." If you are feeling suffocated or anxious right now, I believe that in itself is already a sign.

Whenever I am asked in an interview, "When should I make a move?", I make it a point to ask back, "Can you continue your current way of working for another year?" If you cannot answer immediately that you can continue, it means the time has come. Conversely, for those who feel they can still continue, I do not force them to change jobs. When changing jobs while raising children, it is easier to reach a satisfying choice if you think starting from your own inner feelings rather than external conditions.

■ There are also cases where you just assume you "cannot move"

Here, I would like to introduce an example of someone I met in an interview (the situation has been partially changed so that the individual cannot be identified). Ms. A, who was working reduced hours while raising a 3-year-old child, said in her first interview, "I feel bad for my current company, and job hunting is impossible." Picking up her child, sudden calls due to fever, anxiety about balancing work and life. Everything was true, and I listened to her while feeling, "It certainly isn't easy, is it?"

However, as we organized the conversation, it turned out that what was truly painful for Ms. A was not the "balancing act itself," but the fact that "my current workplace has no understanding of reduced working hours, and I have to be careful every time." So, when she started her job search with a focus on workplaces that are centered on remote work and have an understanding of reduced hours, she was able to move to an environment that was easier to work in than her current one three months later. The reason she thought she couldn't move was not because of the constraints, but because she was assuming a workplace that did not fit those constraints.

After changing jobs, one person told me, "I didn't realize that even with the same reduced working hours, I could feel this much lighter." Many people I meet in interviews truly want to change how they work, but they can't take the first step because their anxiety about balancing work and life takes over. If you feel that way right now, it's not unusual. Many moms are stuck in the same place.

Let me digress for just a moment here.
Kurumi is a place that compiles information on how to find work-from-home jobs and how to think about when to quit for those who are raising children while working shifts in factories, retail, or nursing care. There is no cost to use it (everything is free).
I would be happy if you could take a look later when you are interested. Back to the topic.
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■ Strengths that become apparent precisely because you are raising children

When people talk about changing jobs while raising children, there is often an image that it is "disadvantageous because of the constraints." However, I believe there are perspectives that become strengths precisely because you are raising children.

One is time management skills. The experience of completing tasks within a limited time is a skill that is easily valued in workplaces that seek efficiency. Another is the judgment to set priorities. Those who instantly decide what to do first and what to give up every day can apply that same ability in the workplace. Furthermore, there is the ability to respond to sudden schedule changes. The experience of constantly moving in response to a child's changing physical condition is valuable in workplaces with many changes.

In interviews, I have the impression that those who have become able to explain these strengths in their own words are the ones who end up finding a job they are satisfied with. The skills you have already acquired while raising children may be more in demand in the workplace than you think.

In fact, there are people who say in interviews that they "have no strengths," but their expressions change just by writing down their daily schedule with me. Morning preparations, dropping off at daycare, work, picking up, dinner, and putting them to bed. The fact that you handle this cycle every day is proof of high execution ability. The perspective that you can change jobs precisely because you are raising children is by no means just a consolation; it is a reality I have confirmed many times in the field of interviews.

■ Thinking based on the constraints of pick-ups and fevers

When thinking about the timing of a job change while raising children, what I always value is the perspective of "assuming the constraints" rather than "eliminating the constraints." Whether you can make it in time for pick-up or whether it is easy to take time off when a child has a fever are not things that can be dismissed as mere ideals.

Many of those who were actually able to make a move decided on their "non-negotiable conditions" before starting their job search. For example, what time they can leave work, how much understanding they can expect for sudden absences, whether full remote work is essential, or if it is okay to have some office attendance. If you start your search with vague conditions, you may realize your anxiety about balancing work and life only after receiving a job offer, and end up unable to make a move.

I feel through my interviews that putting your constraints into words beforehand is the shortest path to not missing the right timing. Conversely, there is also the aspect that because you have constraints, the conditions for a workplace that suits you become clearly visible. It is not uncommon for people without constraints to get lost precisely because they can choose anything. Please try to reframe it as your own core being clearly visible precisely because you are raising children now.

■ You don't have to think about it alone

I have shared a lot about the timing of changing jobs while raising children, but there is one last thing I want to tell you. Even if you feel like you 'can't move' right now, it is not because you are weak. It is because having the energy to think about your own career while balancing childcare and work is truly incredibly difficult.

When my own daughter was born weighing 2,220g, I was forced to rethink how I worked. As someone who has been there, I understand the difficulty of balancing childcare and work all too well. That is precisely why I want you to think about changing jobs while raising children with someone else, rather than carrying the burden alone. If you see it through, you can change. The first step toward that doesn't have to be a big decision. Just try talking to someone about your current situation today. That is enough.

👉 Changing jobs while raising children: You don't have to think about it alone

I created a community called 'Kurumi' where you can connect with moms in the same situation while receiving job aptitude assessments and career counseling interviews!

First, please try the job aptitude assessment (free).

Thank you for reading this far.
For those who add me as a friend, I am giving away a PDF titled '3 Things to Check Before You Quit'.
What the people who successfully transitioned had in common was that they did not start by looking for job openings.
Setting a minimum salary and a deadline, translating their past experience into terms applicable to remote work, and creating a space to work within the home. They prepared these three things first before looking at job listings.
There is also a bulletin board where moms in the same situation gather, and you will receive information about it after adding me as a friend.
It is okay to decide later. For now, please just take a look at the first one.
▼ Receive the PDF '3 Things to Check Before You Quit':

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