Cleaning up bird droppings brought more smiles

I am a professional who works flexible hours, and I live with my partner. I prefer to keep my age a secret.
The COVID-19 pandemic brought significant changes to our lives.
In particular, regarding the division of household chores, tasks that I had somehow been handling were forced to be re-evaluated once my partner started working from home.

When we first got married, we didn't really discuss the division of chores, and I just handled most of them. Perhaps this was because I was working part-time, or maybe there was an implicit understanding that it was a woman's role.

However, once my partner started working from home and was there all day, the situation changed completely.

"You don't do this or that."

"I'm always the one doing everything, aren't I?"

Such words began to fly back and forth between us.
Sometimes trivial matters would escalate into major arguments, and our relationship remained strained.
Feeling that we couldn't go on like this, we realized we had to change something.

It was then that I stumbled upon a sheet from the Cabinet Office called the "[Name] Family Strategy Meeting." It is a tool for couples to have honest discussions and re-evaluate their division of household chores. Using this sheet as a reference, we talked again about our values and our thoughts on housework.

https://www.gender.go.jp/public/sakusenkaigi/pdf/sakusenkaigi.pdf

This document is a worksheet for couples to discuss the division of household chores.
Specifically, it can be used in the following ways:

The benefits are as follows:

As a result of our discussion, I became mainly responsible for "cleaning up bird droppings, cleaning the toilet, and taking out the trash," while my partner took charge of cooking.

Why did I end up with these chores?
It is because my partner is not good with birds and doesn't really like cleaning the toilet.
Also, since I am not very good at cooking, we decided that my partner, who is good at it, would handle the cooking while I took on the other chores.

Cleaning up bird droppings is a countermeasure against the mischief of wild birds that come to our balcony. At first, I was horrified every time I went out to the balcony, but now I even feel a sense of exhilaration every time I clean up the bird droppings.

By cleaning the toilet diligently every day, I have also become able to keep it in a clean state at all times.

Taking out the trash is just a matter of bringing it to the apartment's trash area, but it has become an opportunity to exchange greetings with other residents, and I feel like I am a member of a small community.

We do our cleaning at the same time, and when my partner cleans the room, I focus on "cleaning the bathroom."

I love making the bathroom sparkle, and I sometimes listen to my favorite music while cleaning, and burn aroma oil afterward. It has become a blissful time for me.

Since we adopted this new division of chores, our relationship has improved compared to before. This is because our individual burdens have decreased, and we have more peace of mind. In particular, since I am now able to handle only the chores I like, doing housework is no longer painful, and I actually find it enjoyable.

Thanks to the "[Name] Family Strategy Meeting" sheet, we were able to organize our thoughts and re-evaluate our division of chores while respecting each other. Through this experience, I realized once again the importance of couples talking to each other.

I believe that housework is not just a task, but one of the important elements in building a relationship between a couple.

From now on, I want to continue building a home full of smiles while respecting each other.

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