A Friend Who Gives Objective Opinions

I have a best friend to whom I have told over 95% of my history, including my past romantic relationships and family troubles.

I met my best friend when we were in high school, through the brass band we were both in.
We became close because we were both huge fans of RADWIMPS, but I believe our relationship grew into what I would call a best friendship after we went to Okinawa together for the band's tour after graduating high school.
That said, nothing particularly special happened in Okinawa; we just enjoyed the concert and sightseeing.

There wasn't any one critical event, and I don't even remember when I came out to her, but she became a pillar of support for me.

This best friend of mine broke up with a boyfriend she had been with for nearly four years about six months before I did, and although she started working hard on finding a partner and got a new boyfriend a few months ago, they broke up after four months.

Having both experienced heartbreak, we have become comrades-in-arms, talking about the men we meet and matching apps every time we see each other lately.

Around the same time I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, there was someone I was slightly interested in.

・Originally a business owner
・Currently living in a rural area while recovering from depression, but wants to live in the Tokyo metropolitan area again
・Open about his workplace and family
・Wants to use the partnership oath system with his next partner
・Wants to live together
…He was someone like that, and since he was in the same situation and had the same desires as me—living almost entirely openly—and our values were similar, I was drawn to him.

One day, he told me that he had plans to go to Tokyo for his former company, so he wanted to meet me and stay at my place.
Moreover, it wasn't just for one night, but for an unknown number of nights.
I was a bit excited and was actually quite keen on the idea, but when I told my best friend, she said,

“Even if the depression is manageable, I’m feeling suspicious about the fact that he’s trying to stay for multiple nights right from the start,”

and her objective opinion helped me cool my head.
It is certainly abnormal for someone I haven't even met yet, whose values I don't truly know, and whose background I don't know 100%, to stay at my place for several nights, and there is a high risk of my address being exposed if we don't get along.
I pride myself on having lived my life thinking things through quite calmly, but I sometimes display abnormal intensity when it comes to romance, so her opinion really helped me.

After that, he kept pushing me, saying things like “I want you to tell me how you want to proceed” or “I want to hear your feelings,” which made me lose interest. When I honestly told him, “I can’t judge since we haven’t even met, and I honestly feel distressed because it feels like I’m being rushed,” he blocked me, and that was the end of it.

As a result, he may indeed have been an unstable person whom it was better not to meet.
These days, I strongly feel that I want to cherish the friend who gives me objective opinions when I am about to go off the rails.