An adult driven mad by the "ultimate squishiness" on the other side of the screen. I want to survive the 12 o'clock death game and find comfort with my 1-year-old nephew!
Hi everyone, it's KotoTane!
This might be sudden, but everyone, is there something right now that you are staring intensely at your screen for, something you absolutely, no matter what, want to get your hands on?
You might think, "At this stage in your life?" but for me, right now, that thing exists.
It is the "MelloJoy" squishy, which is a massive hit all over Japan and selling like crazy, especially among stylish girls on social media!!
No, first of all, let me say this loud and clear.
It's not because I want to be popular with girls, or because I want to jump on the bandwagon out of vanity—it's not some impure motive like that, okay!? ...It's not that, and it's really not like that at all... (laughs).
This time, I'm going to share why I, a grown adult, have been driven so mad by "MelloJoy" after seeing a single YouTube video. And I'll share the reality of the "desperate death game" that unfolds every day at 12:00 PM.
1. How it all began. Finding the "ultimate squishiness" in one video
To begin with, why was I so captivated by MelloJoy?
The root of all evil (a compliment) was a single short video that happened to pop up on YouTube.
This is the video!
It was a chaotic video (laughs) where a streamer named Daiki-sama "takes a MelloJoy squishy out of the bag, smashes it to pieces, and gets genuinely yelled at."
In the video, the MelloJoy pulled out of the bag was rippling with an unimaginable amount of squishiness and "softness."
If you throw it at a wall, it sticks like a water shuriken, and when you squeeze it, it deforms in a way that looks unbelievably soft. In the end, it got covered in dust and he got scolded, but that "unknown texture" that came through the screen had every cell in my body hooked.
2. Healing for my PC-weary self, and fantasies about my 1-year-old nephew
Every day, I'm chased by work and PC troubleshooting, leaving my mind and body stiff and locked up from facing the screen. To heal myself, I absolutely needed that "ultimate squishiness" I saw in that video.
However, the reason I keep challenging this brutal battle isn't just for a reward for myself.
Actually, I have a cute nephew who just turned one year old.
His very existence is angelic. He is my family's bundle of joy.
I want to let my nephew experience that ultimate, soothing texture.
“If he squeezed a Melojoy with those tiny hands, he’d definitely be so happy...!”
It is precisely because I want to see such a sweet and adorable sight that I am clutching my smartphone again today. In my imagination, my nephew already has a Melojoy in his hands.
However, the real world was not that kind.
3. A heartless '45-minute wait' on the screen. The 12 o'clock checkout war is too hopeless
……Man, I just can't buy it!!! (Sobbing uncontrollably)
I got information that the online store updates its stock every day at 12:00 PM.
There was a time when I was arrogant enough to think, “If there’s a chance every day, I’ll be able to buy it within a few days!”
The actual 12 o'clock is a second-by-second click war (death game) where not even a moment of carelessness is allowed.
I reload the page from 11:59 AM with my heart pounding.
At exactly 12:00, I access it with lightning-fast finger movements and miraculously succeed in adding the item to my cart!
“Yes! I won!!! Nephew, just you wait!!”
Just as I was fired up and about to proceed to the checkout screen, an unbelievably heartless message appeared on the screen.
“Wait time until checkout: 45 minutes”
No, no, no, 45 minutes!!!
Is this a battle for tickets to a popular artist's dome tour?
If I wait patiently for that long, it will be sold out without a trace in an instant!!!
Because rivals from all over the world are accessing it all at once, even if I get it in my cart, I’m not even allowed to stand in the checkout line. I spend my days shouting at my smartphone screen. I’m half-starting to roll my eyes back in frustration.
4. It’s game over if you give up. Until the 'ultimate squishiness' arrives at my home
This despair that arrives every day during my lunch break.
At this rate, it feels like it will be quite a while before I can welcome the Merojoy I've got my eye on into my home... and there are times when I feel like giving up.
But! If I give up here, that really would be game over.
Today and tomorrow, when the clock strikes 12:00, I will focus all my nerves into my index finger and challenge the stock on the other side of the screen.
Just you wait, Merojoy!
Until the day I can deliver the ultimate squishiness to my nephew, I'll keep doing my best every single day!
💡 I'm looking for questions and information from everyone!
Have you had any experience recently winning a fierce online battle (for tickets, rare goods, limited-edition sneakers, etc.)?
Also, if you have any tips like 'It's good to register for Shop Pay' or 'This browser makes it easier to get through checkout wait times,' please share your secret online store strategies in the comments!online store strategy tipsif you have any, please share them secretly in the comments!
Thank you for reading until the end. If you'd like, please support me with a 'Like' or a follow, and it will increase my clicking speed at 12 o'clock tomorrow!