Delusional Daily Report June 27th 'Kanjincho'
8:48 Arrived at work.
When you're alive, you're constantly surprised by the strange hobbies and interests people have. Today, Teru-san is exactly that. During the lunch break, he started talking enthusiastically about this:
“I’ve been looking at them the whole time. The photos of wanted criminals. Because if you find one, the bounty is amazing! Look! This one is worth 8 million yen! This one is a bit lower, but it’s 6 million yen!”
Everyone was half-amazed, saying things like, “You’re so greedy!” “It’s gross that you call them ‘properties’,” and “What? Are you working as a bounty hunter outside of office hours, Teru-san?”
“Besides, even if you did find one, wouldn’t it be scary? I can’t handle that kind of thing! You should be careful!” said Kiri-san, acting like an older sister worried about him. Teru-san, responding like a younger brother, said,
“I’m not going to catch them! Don’t worry! I’m scared too. I’ll just report them. But you know, you can get the reward money just by reporting them!
Take the ‘Matsuyama Hostess Murder Case’ involving Kazuko Fukuda, who had plastic surgery and went on the run. A bounty was placed on her right before the statute of limitations expired, and she was caught because a regular customer at the same oden shop reported her.
Thanks to that, the ‘Special Investigation Reward’ system was officially established later on. Out of about 60 cases in the past, it seems over 10 people have actually gotten the money!
So, Hatta, Mitate, Kogure/Obara, Uechi/Miyauchi, Matayoshi/Hishikawa! I’m definitely going to get them! I’m going to get those bounties! Hahaha!”
He counted off the wanted criminals as if they were names of his favorite monsters, and his eyes looked strangely intense.
Just then, Section Chief Benkei from next door came over to the Department Manager, bringing his subordinate, Goriki-san. He was there to suggest that, regarding a project that had been going poorly since the other day, they be allowed to handle it again.
After listening to Section Chief Benkei’s flowing, masterful petition—which was truly like a ‘Kanjincho reading’—the Department Manager said,
“No, but that failure was due to the incompetence of your Yoshitsune-kun, right? You left that unresolved and went into hiding, and now you want to try again with a different subordinate. It feels like you’re just trying to pull the wool over people’s eyes.
…Or rather, you there, Goriki-san? Wait? You’re not… Yoshitsune-kun, are you? Something about your face…”
“No! …This is not Yoshitsune,” said Section Chief Benkei.
“…Is that so? Somehow, you look very similar. …The perm is different, but the eyes are identical, or rather…”
“No! They don’t look alike. Hey, you! It’s, it’s your fault. Tell the Department Manager yourself! Hey, you! Seriously, you!”
As soon as he managed to extract a tentative approval from the Department Manager, who was still tilting his head in confusion, Section Chief Benkei hurried back to his seat as if to shield Goriki-san.
The gazes of Teru-san and Kiri-san, who were occasionally watching the section chief and his group—especially Goriki-san—were, for some reason, strangely eerie and glittering.
#CreativeWriting #ShortStory #ShortShort #Diary #3LineDiary #Kanjincho #Benkei #MinamotoNoYoshitsune #Goriki #WantedCriminal #WhatAreYouTalkingAbout