📚261: Sometimes Let Go of Full Effort! Skyrocket Trust with Comfortable White Space
🟠 Prologue 🟠
- Introduction -
Hello, this is Tochamin.
I usually read for about 30 minutes a day.
I have condensed the things that stayed in my heart and the insights I learned
into tips for living!I hope they are useful for your daily life too♪
This time,
it's about when to relax and how to create comfortable white space!
※ Please also check out this article for the reasons why I continue reading and what I learn (^^)!!
🟩 Reading Details 🟩
🟥 Learning ① 🟥
- How to Relax -
A person's level of mastery shows in how they relax.
The balance of when to engage and when to disengage
says it all.
[First-Class]
Knows when to relax
They focus their energy on one point, but
thoroughly relax at all other times.
Because there is relaxation,
they can carve out a melody that leads
to the next moment of engagement.
[Second-Class]
Runs too hard
Always giving full effort, not knowing how to catch their breath.
They give the impression of working hard, but
their lack of composure can also
end up tiring others out.
[Third-Class]
Strains in the wrong direction
Obsessed with their own style that yields no results.
Straining too hard narrows their perspective,
and instead of results, they lose trust.
🟦 Learning ② 🟦
- How to Use Silence -
Silence is not an awkward lack of sound, but
an important white space for letting emotional understanding soak into the other person's heart.
With this one breath,
the other person can be sure
that you are accepting their heart.
[First-Class]
Makes the pause an ally
Avoids shallow judgments based on momentum,
and gently sways the other person's heart in the silence.
Waits until the other person speaks at a comfortable pace,
and creates a pause to lay out silence until they finish speaking.
[Second-Class]
Consumed by anxiety
Slightly imposes their own pace.
Unconsciously taking away the space for the other person to breathe,
and entering meddlesome mode.
[Third-Class]
Talking too much or staying too silent
Talking only about yourself and creating a sense of pressure, or
continuing an unnatural silence.
This extreme atmosphere reveals a lack of confidence
and breeds distrust.
🟨 Lesson ③ 🟨
- Make Hobbies Your Weapon -
Hobbies are playgrounds that create the lingering resonance of life.
However, if you handle them incorrectly,
they become either a waste of money or empty time-killing.
[First-Class]
Have a philosophy in your hobbies
Synchronize them with a philosophy for living better
and use them as an amplifier to nurture yourself.
You embody your own thoughts through your hobbies.
[Second-Class]
Invest too much in hobbies
You invest excessively in hobbies, but
whether it is to show off to others
or just as a mental stabilizer,
it does not resonate with the heart.
[Third-Class]
Not a hobby, but just killing time
A state where you have nothing you can call a hobby.
You have no topics to discuss, and the scenery does not change even when you are together.
🟣 Epilogue 🟣
- Summary of this time -
Through today's reading,
I learned about when to relax your efforts
and the importance of comfortable white space!
Are you holding your breath, thinking,
"I must always do my best with full effort!"?
First-class people know when to relax their efforts.
They concentrate their energy on one point, but
they thoroughly relax at other times.
Because of this relaxation,
they can carve out a melody that leads to
the next moment to exert effort!
If you are always running too hard or
pushing yourself in the wrong direction,
you might end up tiring others out
with your lack of composure💦
And, silence in conversation is
not an awkward lack of sound.
By making the pause your ally,
you let emotional conviction soak into the other person's heart.
Wait until the other person speaks at a comfortable pace,
and take a pause until they finish speaking.
This one breath creates conviction and trust😌
Furthermore, hobbies are playgrounds that create the lingering resonance of life.
Synchronize your hobbies with your own philosophy
and turn them into an amplifier to nurture yourself.
Do not let them end as a waste of money or empty time-killing;
embody your own thoughts through your hobbies.
If you do that, the depth and richness of your life
will increase✨
If you think,
"My heart is tired from human relationships..."
"I want to grow more, but
I don't know what to do..."
If you feel that way,
why not use these tips on how to relax your efforts
and how to use silence?
Next Preview
Next time,
it will be about smart ways for adults to interact
to avoid conflict!
Highlights so far
[Summary 1]
[Summary 2]
[Summary 3]
[Summary 4]