I made a user manual for myself, and it actually felt a bit refreshing

The other day, I was impressed by a tweet from Dai Tamesue, an athlete I have long supported who is now a businessman. While whether or not you can actually act on it depends on the situation, it is certainly easier to make decisions if you know how you want to be treated.

Seeing that, Keisuke Mizuno, a former colleague whom I have long respected as a facilitator, also wrote his own user manual.

It's a bit frustrating when an acquaintance quickly does something you were originally thinking of doing yourself. For that reason, I decided to give it a try, albeit a bit late.

Perhaps because it's hard to create a user manual from scratch, Tamesue provided a format. Here is the result of me using it while eating ice cream at Royal Host. Here we go.

Strengths

1. What is something you do 'without thinking' as if you were breathing?
Observing the interpersonal relationships in a room and creating a correlation diagram in my head.

2. What is something you are 'surprisingly' thanked for by others relative to the effort you put in?
Taking charge of the initial order at a drinking party, picking out appropriate food, and getting it placed quickly.

3. What is the biggest discrepancy between your self-evaluation and others' evaluation of you?
People often think I calculate things precisely, but I am actually very intuitive. Some people have probably figured this out. The moves I make based on intuition or improvisation often hit the mark better than those I think through thoroughly. What flows through my head is not language, but images. I write sentences as if I am re-explaining the flowing images in Japanese.

4. What is a weakness you just cannot overcome?
Getting genuinely angry at people who try to assert dominance over me.

Groups

1. Where do you prefer to sit in a large space?
If possible, I would rather not sit. I would prefer to be moving around as a staff member preparing the venue.

2. What is a comfortable number of people for a dinner party?
Four.

3. Does it bother you if someone looks like they aren't having fun?
It doesn't bother me at all.

4. When you are talking to someone, can you hear the conversations behind or next to you?
No, I cannot.

5. Can you explain three habits of your boss?
Of course.

6. Which is more comfortable, sitting at a counter or facing someone?
The counter.

Communication

1. Does it bother you if someone interrupts you while you are talking?
Yes, it does. I even protest to my own young children when they do it.

2. How much do you dislike being spoken to when you are engrossed in something?
I don't particularly dislike it, but I want people to understand that when I am engrossed, I truly cannot hear them, so there is no guarantee I will be able to respond.

3. How much does your attitude change when talking to someone with more power versus someone with less?
In terms of the power axis, I don't think it changes all that much (at least, that's what I tell myself).

4. Do you like talking to children?
If the child has something they want to convey, I like listening to them and want to engage with them seriously. I can't handle the 'tell me something funny' type of interaction with anyone other than my own daughter.

5. Do you frequently rephrase things into words the other person can understand?
I do. I've been making a living doing that for years.

'Desire'

1. What is something you want so badly you can't tell anyone?
I want people to invite me out for meals more casually.

2. Do you want power or influence?
Power. I want the ability to break through situations on my own and the ability to be the trump card for the people I care about.

3. What do people you envy possess?
A clever way of using their brain, or a sturdy stomach.

4. When you want something, can you say so honestly, or can't you, or do you rephrase it?
I can't. I absolutely cannot say it.

5. How annoyed do you get when you give someone something and they don't thank you?
A little. I'm aware that my own range of preferences is narrow, so I can understand the feeling when a gift doesn't match someone's taste. Still, on an irrational level, it does annoy me.

'Territory'

1. Does it bother you when your things are used without permission?
It does. Because no one values my things more than I do.

2. If you were cheated on, who would you be more angry at: your partner or the person they cheated with?
My partner. I want them to explain why they broke the balance of the relationship we built without following any sincere procedures.

3. How many people do you occasionally worry about, wondering if they are living their lives properly?
None. I assume everyone is managing somehow.

4. When you invite a friend to your home, can you tolerate them bringing another friend along without asking?
It depends on the 'other friend.' If it's someone with whom I have a good relationship, I might even be happy about it rather than just tolerating it. If not, it's a nuisance.

*****

I'm not really sure. On one hand, I want to be invited to meals, but on the other, I might not even reply if I am invited—well, of course I wouldn't get invited then. Am I a cat? Still, being able to say definitively, 'If it's between power and influence, then power,' felt very much like me, and I think this answer is quite close to my true essence.

I think I generally like people. However, I probably want to pour more energy into myself and the people close to me than into people in general.

No matter how I look at it, I'm not the type to lead a massive project, but on the other hand, I might be the type who can demonstrate strength when organizing the smaller teams that carry out such large projects. If asked, I feel like I would at least volunteer to provide food for a project that's going up in flames.

My current job requires that kind of hospitality, and I think I'm doing reasonably well at it. It's a profession I drifted into, but in the end, I suppose I've settled where I was meant to be.