Breastfeeding and Pumping for Babies with Cleft Lip and Palate, aka the Dairy Cow Life

After giving birth, my son was immediately taken to the NICU, and I returned to the perinatal ward.
Babies with cleft lip and palate cannot breastfeed directly very well, so the basic routine is pumping followed by feeding with a specialized cleft palate bottle. Before long, my pumping life—aka the 'Am I a dairy cow?' era—began.

For about a year after that, I pumped 5 to 8 times a day. After trying every pump out there, I found that the fastest and most efficient way was to use a Medela manual pump while squeezing my breast tissue firmly with one hand.

At the hospital, they recommended the Medela electric pump, saying it was easier. It was indeed wonderful, as it allowed me to finish pumping just by attaching the device to my chest like a dairy cow, but it was too gentle and didn't put any strain on my breasts, so it took too long (about 30 minutes).
In contrast, my method involved flattening my breast, pushing the mammary glands as hard as I could, pressing the pump firmly against my nipple to cover as much area as possible to increase the yield per session, and pumping the handle as fast as I could. It was a harsh environment for my breasts, but it was a style that allowed me to deliver breast milk to my baby faster (about 20 minutes for both breasts).

I feared that if I kept this up, my breasts would end up shaped like a cow's, but three years after I finished pumping, the sagging was, well, about what you'd expect.

I tried various pumps other than Medela, but I felt that Medela was the best in terms of handle grip and comfort against the chest. (This was back in 2017.)

Feeding exclusively with pumped milk was quite exhausting. One routine consisted of pumping (20 minutes), feeding, and washing the pump and bottle (soaking them in disinfectant solution). It was too late to start pumping after the baby started crying, and if the baby kept crying after drinking the milk, I couldn't let go to wash the pump properly. Since the next feeding would come in 2.5 to 3 hours, keeping up this routine, including at night, was grueling. I couldn't hold the baby while pumping, and sometimes I had to let him cry alone for nearly 20 minutes because my pumping was delayed (crying).

I had to factor this into my plans when going out, so the two-hour trip to the hospital was very difficult. Sometimes I miscalculated and the time would come when I was still 30 minutes away from the nearest station on the train. I would have to get off at the next station, find a place to pump nearby, and of course, my son would be crying the whole time.

Looking back, I don't think I needed to work so hard at breastfeeding once the six-month postpartum period, when the baby receives immunity from the mother, had passed. When he was born, the neonatologist told me, 'Breast milk is easier to digest, so I want you to do your best with pumping,' and I got so fired up that I thought, 'Alright, I'll do it!'

What was interesting was that as the baby grew, there would come a time when the amount of breast milk was suddenly insufficient for the amount he wanted to drink. With direct breastfeeding, it's said that the amount produced automatically increases as the baby drinks more, but with pumping, since the baby isn't nursing, there's no signal to increase production. So, when that happened, I would just eat more, and the amount produced would increase as if by magic. I ate a lot regardless of my appetite. I recorded the amount he actually drank every time and submitted it to the hospital, so I was managing my breast milk supply like an athlete.

That eventually reached its limit, and after that, the amount I pumped gradually decreased. By the time he was nearly a year old, I started using formula as well, and my pumping life came to an end.