Time Spent with People vs. Time Spent in One's Head
When I am lost in thought, time passes without me noticing. Words flow one after another, and hours go by in the blink of an eye. But looking back, I haven't come up with any groundbreaking ideas, nor have I managed to articulate any important realizations. In the end, I am just circling the same thoughts over and over again. In terms of return on investment, it is time where I haven't even produced 0.1 from 1 unit of effort. There are limits to what can be achieved with just words and imagination.
On the other hand, time spent with people has a mysterious value. The time spent meeting someone, talking, or going out becomes a meaningful experience in itself. Spending time together as two people can create four times the value, and 100 experiences can turn into 10,000 memories. Strangely, during those times, not many words flow through my head. Even so, I feel that it is time with definite meaning. Perhaps that is because people who have walked different paths in life are exchanging perspectives and experiences that only they possess.
We acknowledge each other's existence and find meaning in simply being together. Wanting to share joy, seeking comfort, venting frustrations, feeling a connection—countless meanings are born from such tacit understandings. That is the value of the rich time woven between people, something that cannot be fully expressed in words.
However, I tend to underestimate such invisible value. I dismiss it with phrases like 'just because' or 'going with the flow,' and miss opportunities to meet people. Even though I always think 'I'm glad I did it' when I actually meet them, I find it hard to get moving. Instead, I tend to retreat into the world inside my head.
Ultimately, time spent in my head is nothing more than escapism. Someone once said that stress is born when you turn your eyes away from what you should be doing. Even if I hide in my head and wait for time to pass, the problems of reality do not get solved.
If I am going to spend time in my head, I should direct it toward things like reading novels or watching movies. There, one finds diverse perspectives and worlds unknown to oneself. Isn't that what a meaningful 'escape' is?
Writing things down makes me feel like I've made some progress. But simply putting into words what is already inside me doesn't change anything. Facing reality and working on what is necessary—that stoic way of living is what is truly important.
Without being satisfied with the assets of illusion, I must first discern what is worth thinking about. And only when that thought seems capable of creating something new should I let my mind wander. That is the conclusion I have reached from these 30 minutes of reflection.