Self-Introduction of an HSS-type HSP and AC: I Found It Easier to Breathe Once I Stopped Trying to Meet Expectations
*This article was revised and updated on July 13, 2026.
In my mid-30s, after continuing to adapt unreasonably to meet the expectations of those around me, I reached my limit and broke down both mentally and physically.
What helped me rebuild myself from there was writing, thinking, and putting things into words.
What I leave on note is a record of verifying, one by one, the true nature of why I felt so exhausted.
I hope that when you finish reading, you will feel that the vague feelings you couldn't explain well have been put into words here.
Until I came to a stop
The sign came one morning at the washbasin.
The water I splashed to wash my face got into my right eye and stung intensely. I realized I could no longer close my right eyelid properly.
When I looked in the mirror, the right side of my face wouldn't move correctly. It was facial nerve paralysis.
The doctor's diagnosis was a decline in immune function due to overwork and stress. While I kept pushing myself, thinking I had to do my best, my heart was screaming that I had reached my limit. I now believe it was a forced shutdown from my body as a result of ignoring that contradiction.
After I started recuperating, I began writing down what was in my head in a notebook and walking in quiet parks. I would write and then pause. Through that repetition, I gradually became able to give myself permission to stop meeting other people's expectations.
That journey later became a book. More details in the second half of this article.
[Profile]
Name: Kazu
Temperament: HSS-type HSP (strong curiosity but prone to running out of energy) | AC (Adult Child) | Avoidant | Introverted
Labels: Blood Type B | INFJ
Background: Table tennis club in technical high school, band club in engineering school. Changed jobs 5 times in system-related work
Lifestyle: Minimalist living alone. Have atopic dermatitis. Sensory sensitivity, gentle way of speaking
Likes: Walking, reading, anime, incense, black humor
[Communication]
● Living by my own standards instead of meeting expectations
I dig into the roots of the habit of acting based on "I have to do this right" or "I have to meet expectations," exploring everything from the fear of abandonment to over-adaptation.
▶ What you'll get: You'll be able to name the guilt you feel on nights when you can't say no, realizing that "there was a reason it happened."
● Reframing life's difficulties as the "power to notice"
I re-examine situations where I felt drained due to the sensitivity of being an HSP, AC, or introvert, viewing them instead as "moments where I noticed something was off faster than others."
▶ What you'll get: You'll be able to treat the traits you once blamed as weaknesses as your own unique characteristics.
● Writing, pausing, and returning to myself
Writing in a notebook, walking while muttering to myself. I introduce the practices I actually use to loosen up my overwhelmed mind, just as I do them.
▶ What you'll get: You can pick up steps to "return to yourself" that you can start imitating today.
[Book]
"I Started Breathing Easier Once I Decided to Stop Meeting Expectations"
The title is exactly how I feel. I have compiled the journey from my days at the limit to the point where I could breathe a little easier.
Read this article for the story behind the publication.
You can find the book here (it's free to read with Kindle Unlimited).
[Finally]
This note is a record of my life while living with an overthinking mind.
Rather than neat conclusions, I am leaving here the things I felt when I stopped to think.
I hope this can be a place you return to on days when you are tired of thinking or tired of meeting other people's expectations.
Instead of words that lead, I want to offer words that can sit beside you.
With that feeling, I will continue to share my unadorned, true self.
Your likes, comments, and follows are a great encouragement to my activities.