What happens in your head when you're feeling down? Small rituals to break free from the loop of 'overthinking'.

The moment you leave the office and suddenly find yourself alone.
Have you ever had the events of the day play back in your head like slow motion?

“Was the way I said that a bit cold?”
“I should have been able to come up with a wittier response.”
“Why did I make such a basic mistake?”

Maybe you weren't yelled at by anyone.
Maybe everyone around you has already completely forgotten about it.
And yet, the 'self-reflection meeting' inside your head just never seems to end.

That feeling where you suddenly want to hold your head in your hands and scream.
You want to crawl into a hole, and if you could, you'd erase the memory of today entirely...

Tonight might be one of those nights where you're blaming yourself like that.
When your energy is at rock bottom, it's okay not to force yourself to look forward.

Reading this far might have made you feel a little better. But actually, something much simpler is happening inside your head.

When you're feeling down, your brain loses the ability to distinguish between 'fact' and 'imagination'. A drained brain automatically replays only the worst-case scenarios.
Therefore, the 'sense of despair' you are feeling right now might be closer to an 'illusion' shown to you by a tired brain rather than reality itself.

Worrying about five or ten years from now might actually be an 'illusion'

Right after you fail or when you're feeling down, your thoughts tend to spiral from bad to worse, don't they?

“Maybe my evaluation went down because of this.”
“Maybe I won't be trusted anymore.”
“Will I be able to keep going here in the future?”

Your head becomes filled with anxiety about an invisible future.
But let's try shifting our perspective back to the 'past' for a moment.

Exactly five years ago, or ten years ago.
Can you clearly remember what you were worried about or what made you feel down?

You were likely agonizing over something completely different from your current worries.
It might have been the relationships of that time, or some completely different trouble.
Or perhaps it was something so trivial you can't even remember it anymore.

There is only one thing that is certain.
Most of the 'serious worries' of that time were either solved by time or disappeared after changing form.
The anxiety that is crushing your chest right now is also highly unlikely to be on your calendar five years from now.

Rather than wearing yourself out worrying about the future, just 'breathing in this very moment' is enough of an achievement.
Your future self will figure out the future.

To finish worrying, try getting it all 'out'

Even so, if your thoughts won't stop asking 'why did I do that?', then 'worrying until you're done with it' is one way to go.

However, I don't recommend doing it only inside your head.
Because your brain's memory will get full and it will short-circuit.

A notebook, the memo app on your phone, or even a scrap of paper is fine.
Try writing down the words that are popping into your head right now, just as they are.

“It's painful.”
“I'm embarrassed.”
“I'm scared.”
“I want to run away.”

It can be foul language, complaints, or incoherent rambling.
You don't have to write politely, as no one else is going to see it.

Writing things out is an act of emotional excretion.
It is the process of taking the toxins you've been bottling up and releasing them from your body in the form of words.

As an HSS-type HSP, your mind tends to have multiple emotions running at once. When you write them down, they line up in a row. That is why it becomes quiet.

When you look at them written down, a moment arrives where you can be as calm as if you were looking at someone else's problems, thinking, 'Ah, so this is what I'm hurt by right now.'
You might realize that the giant monster inflating in your head was actually just a string of words.

You don't need to look for a solution.
Just 'get it out'.
That alone will gradually cool down the heat in your brain.

Just noticing that you aren't firing the 'second arrow' yourself is enough

A mistake at work or a conversation that didn't go well.
This is the 'first arrow'.
As long as you are living, there is no way to avoid these arrows flying at you.

It hurts and it's sad, isn't it?
But what is truly eating away at your heart might be the 'second arrow' you fire at yourself afterward.

'This is not good enough.'
'Why am I so incompetent?'
'Everyone must be fed up with me.'

Aren't you blaming yourself and widening the wound for a fact that has already occurred?

What you need when you're feeling down is not a late-night reflection session.
Just noticing, 'Oh, I just tried to attack myself.'
'The first arrow hit and it hurts. Of course I'm feeling down.'
Just acknowledging it like that is enough.

If you stop firing the second arrow, the wound will close through its natural healing power.
Stop the attack.
That is the greatest kindness you can show yourself right now.

Today's goal is 'having survived'

A brain exhausted from overthinking is seeking rest.
Take a warm bath and just wrap yourself in your blankets.
Shut out the sounds of the outside world and spend some quiet time.

Even if you do nothing and have no productivity, you survived the day.
That alone means today's mission is complete.

If you feel down about the same thing again tomorrow, it's not a step backward; it's proof that you are truly living.

Turn off your thinking switch and get some good rest.

About me

📌 Click here for my profile

🗺️ Click here for the site map