Until My Mother's 'Dislikes' Became My Own

Good evening, this is Kao.

I would like to talk about how the word 'dislike' coming from a mother's mouth affects her children.

Nowadays, there are many dual-income households,
and perhaps there isn't much difference in the influence between mothers and fathers,
but in my case, my father was often away on business or working in a different city,
so my stay-at-home mother was the one who primarily raised me.

Writing this now,
I realize I have a personality that clearly states what I 'dislike',
but I thought that when I have children,
I might want to choose my words more carefully, like saying 'I'm not fond of' or 'I don't really like' something.

Oh, I love my mother dearly,
and I have absolutely no complaints about how she raised me (laughs).
We are going on a trip together soon,
and I'm looking forward to it so much!

Disliking people

One day, while watching TV,
my mother said,
'Ugh! So-and-so (an actor) is on! I hate them!'

And then she changed the channel.
(Wait, I was watching that lol)

But if she hated the performer, it couldn't be helped.
Thinking that, whenever that person appeared while my mother was around,
I started secretly changing the channel.

After that, I also
started to feel like, 'I'm not really fond of this person...'
Even though I originally thought nothing of them.

The word 'dislike' must have
looped around and warped its way into me.

Regarding singers, too,
'I hate So-and-so's songs, they're monotonous and boring,'
she would say,
and while I also felt they were monotonous and boring,
I didn't even know enough about this person's music to say I 'hated' it.

But naturally, the frequency with which I listened to them decreased,
and if they came up on shuffle play,
I started skipping them.

The word 'dislike' must have
looped around and warped its way into me.

Even now that I am living alone,
that habit has stuck.
I change the channel if they appear on music programs,
and if they are in a movie, I won't watch it unless I really want to.
That's how I live my life.

Disliking food

My mother is an incredibly good cook.
It's delicious, and probably healthy too.
From quick meals to dishes that take time to prepare,
I basically love everything she makes.
I did have things I didn't like when I was a child, though,
like rapeseed dressed with tofu. It was too much of an adult flavor.

But there are menus that never appear.
・Pacific saury
・Blue-backed fish like mackerel
・Fish roe like spicy cod roe
・Offal like tripe
・Shellfish

Those are things my mother 'dislikes'.
Events like the Saury Festival
that appear on the news when autumn comes around.

She says she can't understand why people go to them lol.
It's fine, let them enjoy what they like.

Naturally, I also started avoiding those things.
I don't want to eat them even if they are served at school lunch.
I don't want to eat them even if I go to a high-end restaurant.
I don't touch them even if I go to a drinking party.
Just like that.

'Dislike' is certainly a power word.

Regarding food, my mother didn't openly say she disliked things, but
she used the word 'dislike' quite often when it came to people.

I really feel that it is a power word.

If my mother hadn't said she disliked them, I might have watched a movie by so-and-so and grown to like it, or
I might have been able to enjoy songs by so-and-so.

There is always some kind of bias involved, and
I feel like I start off with a sense of 'I'm not really good with this'.

I've come to like mentaiko!

Speaking of food, I've come to like mentaiko.
I didn't have the habit of eating it,
and because of my personality of disliking things without trying them,
I couldn't bring myself to try it for a long time,
but when I tried a little bit of the mentaiko that came with a set meal,

Oh, this is actually okay.

I thought. I ate a small amount.
I also tried mentaiko pasta,

Oh, this is also okay.

I thought. I ate it all.
Finally, I tried eating it with rice.

Oh, it's actually perfectly fine.

It took a long time, but
at 27, I learned the taste of mentaiko and came to like it.

After all, to flatten out a bias,
it takes a fair amount of time.

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