[Essay] The Thing Children Are Happiest to Receive from Their Parents

As a mother in her forties raising a child, I have an elementary school-aged son.

Before I had children, I thought about many things, such as “How will I raise my child once they are born?” The thing I looked forward to most after my child was born was reading picture books together. This is because when I was little, we had many picture books at home, and I loved having my mother read them to me.

When I was still in preschool, I would go to the bookshelf every night before bed and pick out many picture books I wanted to have read to me. I can still remember the happiness of carrying those picture books to the futon where my mother was. Since I also had a younger brother, she would always read at least two books every night.

My mother was a school teacher, so there were times when she wasn't home at night, such as during school trips. At those times, I could listen to stories she had recorded on cassette tapes for me beforehand.

After I became a mother myself, I read several picture books with my child every night. As those with children know, children will insist on having the same picture book read to them over and over again.

My son loved the Shinkansen picture book 'Let's Go by Shinkansen' and a geeky book explaining the flow of the Tama River from its source to the sea called 'Tamagawa,' and I read them at least 100 times, no joke.

Since I worked full-time during the day, I was quite tired at night, and there were many times when I would lose consciousness while reading (lol), but I reached a level where I could recite the text unconsciously from reading it so many times. A mother's strength is real.

But that is exactly what I wanted to do in raising my child.

Because I believed that the thing children are happiest to receive from their parents is not snacks or toys, but the fun 'time' spent together with their parents.

Reading the same book over and over, or playing catch in the park forever—when raising children, I think you are often asked to do things that are the exact opposite of 'efficiency' and 'productivity'.

I am a person who loves work, and I have continued to work hard both before and after having my child. That is why I pursue 'efficiency' and 'productivity' to my heart's content at work during the day.

But precisely because of that, I have decided to face my child at a pace three times slower than usual when I am with them. Listening slowly, speaking slowly, and accompanying my child forever and ever as they happily repeat the same things over and over...

The trigger for this was a story I heard from a middle-aged man before I had my child.

That was a story from the Showa era. During that period of rapid economic growth, there must have been many events in his childhood. Yet, his fondest memory was playing catch in the park. When I heard that story, I truly felt

"Ah, I understand."

My mother, smiling and staying with me for so long, just for my sake. I don't think there is anything that makes a child feel their parent's love more than that.

Even if you have plenty of money and can buy many things, not many people feel happy when they are all alone. Having someone you love spend so much time just for you is, in fact, a true luxury.

I resonated so deeply with this story that I decided when I had a child, I wanted to be a mother who would always, always be there for the things my child loves.

That is why reading the same book over and over again with my son until he was satisfied was a happy time for me as well.

Perhaps thanks to that, my son has grown into a kind boy who cares for his parents. He will be in junior high school next year; he is sensible and is already becoming independent.

Of course, I don't know yet if this parenting was a success. Everyone's life is different, and whether my son's life is happy is something he will decide for himself from here on.

However, even when my son grows from a boy to a young man and becomes a father, and even when I become a grandmother, I want to continue to be a mother who generously spends the time my son wants from me for his sake.

The thing children are happiest to receive from their parents

I will continue to cherish such time.