🌙 "Forgive yourself": The single phrase that reached me at an event I happened to stop by
Back when I was living through days that felt like rock bottom.
Even though I held a qualification as a Mayan calendar advisor,
I had no room in my heart or my life, so I stopped studying,
and even touching upon spirituality felt like a heavy burden.
I thought I used to love spirituality,
but it reached a point where engaging with that world actually made me feel worse,
because I was simply "doing my best just to survive."
At that time,
on my way home from shopping during a day off,
I found a row of fortune-telling booths at a city event space,
and my feet suddenly stopped.
There was no reason for it, but
in that moment, my intuition moved me to "try stopping by."
🪽 A fortune teller's words sank deep into my heart
When I sat down, the fortune teller listened to my story for a while, then
said this in a quiet but confident voice.
"It's time to forgive yourself.
You are too hard on yourself."
In that instant, something collapsed deep within my chest,
and the feelings I had been holding onto so tightly began to unravel.
It felt as if that one phrase had touched the pain
that no one else had ever noticed.
🌿 My "interest" quietly returned after hearing about star reading
Strangely enough,
the conversation with the fortune teller turned to star reading (Western astrology).
Even during my darkest days,
I found that watching the movement of the stars and the phases of the moon strangely calmed my heart.
I remembered that faint sensation for the first time in a long while.
"You're interested in star reading, too, aren't you?"
When they said that to me,
my curiosity, which had been at a standstill, breathed a small sigh of life.
🌙 The moment my intuition "picked up" the answer
When I got home, I naturally opened my Mayan calendar book.
What was written there was
a keyword I had studied a long time ago.
"White Wizard: The theme is 'forgiveness'"
In that moment,
the fortune teller's words and
the theme that had been sleeping within me
overlapped perfectly.
It was as if my subconscious
"This is it. These are the words you were truly seeking."
was telling me that.
🌿 Realizing I was an HSP allowed me to finally cherish myself
Around that time, learning about the HSP trait
finally connected all the dots.
I was sensitive, easily tired, and hurt more deeply than others.
I had convinced myself that this was a "weakness," but
I was wrong.
I was simply
perceiving the world more carefully than others.
And at the same time,
the reason that had been stuck deep in my heart quietly revealed itself.
It was—
being born as the eldest daughter and always being expected to be "reliable."
Ever since I was little,
"I have to do things properly"
"I must not be a burden to others"
"I can't show my weak side"
I grew up engraving those words into myself.
That way of living
naturally created a sense of "perfectionism."
Furthermore, after becoming an adult,
I often worked in positions of responsibility,
where mistakes were not allowed, I couldn't show weakness,
and it was expected that I would carry things out flawlessly.
Those days continued on and on.
Always keeping my guard up in front of others,
blaming myself behind the scenes,
and constantly pushing myself by saying, "I should have been able to do more."
All of that
was because my sensitivity as an HSP,
my sense of responsibility as the eldest daughter,
and my heavy position at work were all overlapping.
When I realized that,
the tension in my heart finally eased.
"Being too hard on yourself isn't because you are weak.
It's because you have been carrying the responsibility for so long."
The moment I could understand that,
for the first time, the words "it's okay to cherish yourself"
felt incredibly natural to me.
That
connected deeply with the theme of "forgiveness,"
and became the beginning of my new way of life.
☕ Forgiving is not losing
It is a light for "starting life over."
That single message I received on a chance detour on my way home from shopping,
became a turning point in my life.
Forgiving is
not about justifying mistakes or forgetting the past.
"It is about re-embracing the self who has worked so hard until now."
That was the "forgiveness" that the words from that day taught me.
🪽 To those who are suffering in the same way right now
If you are currently
being too hard on yourself,
and your heart feels too heavy to move,
it's okay.
You have your own pace.
The words you need to pick up
are surely waiting for you somewhere, quietly.
"It's okay to forgive yourself."
Those words are the light for you to start walking again.
Lunaria🌙 | A healing note connecting stars and hearts
☀️ Gemini / 🌙 Scorpio / Asc. Virgo / HSS-type HSP
Western Astrology, Tarot, and Mayan Calendar Advisor🔮