The Man I Want an Office Clerk to Slap

A few years ago, there was a period when I was going all-out on matching apps (or rather, Tinder).

After various twists and turns, following my divorce, I declared, 'Single life is the best! Being lazy is the best! I want to be single forever!' and lived a decadent life. Seeing such a pathetic state, a friend scolded me, saying, 'Are you really okay with ending up as a woman who just grows old in vain?'
I thought, 'Well, maybe I should try meeting someone I can go out for a casual meal with.' And if things go well... well, it's not impossible, right? After all, it's Tinder. That was the mindset with which I downloaded the app, full of ulterior motives.Basically just looking for a hookup.

What on earth does this woman think of her friend's good intentions?

During the year or so I continued using the app, there were some people I became close enough with to still keep in touch and go out for drinks, and I also encountered many so-called 'interesting men.' It would be a waste to keep the stories of those boys to myself, so I'll try writing them down as far as I can remember.

※Please note that since I used the matching app several years ago, I don't know the current specifications of the app, and because my memory is not entirely clear, there are parts that have been significantly abbreviated.

1. About the other party

2. From matching to actually meeting

I matched with him because I liked the vibe of his profile picture.

After exchanging face photos, the plan to meet was decided quickly, and I agreed to his suggestion: 'Let's bring some drinks and snacks and drink at a hotel.'
(It's helpful that things are moving fast~)

On the day, he came to pick me up at the meeting spot by car, and after shopping together at a nearby supermarket, we headed to the hotel he said he had reserved.
In addition to having talked on the phone a few times since matching, Rui-kun himself was a very bright and easy-to-talk-to type, so I headed to our destination without feeling nervous.
Up to this point, I didn't feel anything particularly strange, and I was even thinking, 'Maybe this person is a good match~.' Oh, you naive, flower-brained idiot.

3. Arrival at the hotel

He dropped me off in front of the entrance of a common business hotel, and it was then that I felt a slight doubt at his words as he left to move the car: 'I'm going to park the car, so go inside first and wait in front of the elevator.'
(...Why in front of the elevator? What about checking in?)
Although I thought, 'Something is strange...', I went into the hotel as told and waited in front of the elevator while nodding to the hotel staff. At that time, since I was asked, 'Are you a guest staying here?', I replied, 'Someone else is coming soon, we haven't checked in yet.'

4. Fumbling

Rui-kun appeared after finishing parking the car, but he didn't even look at me in front of the elevator and headed straight to the reception.
The moment I saw that series of actions, my suspicion that 'Ah, this guy is up to something' turned into certainty, so I decided to sneak up behind him and call out to him at the reception.

That's right. Rui-kun was just a total piece of trash who tried to sneak a girl into a hotel booked for one person per room, hoping to have a cheap good time. (And since he was way too practiced at it, this clearly wasn't his first offense.)

Honestly, any woman with a normal sense of judgment would have probably snapped, yelled 'No way! That's so gross!', and left at this point. But unfortunately, I'm the type of person who absolutely loves other people's misfortune (like him having to pay for the extra costs he hadn't planned on), so I went ahead with the hotel drinking session as scheduled. (Kids, don't try this at home.)

5. That excuse is just impossible

After making him re-check in at the regular rate, the moment we got into the room, Rui-kun apologized profusely, saying, 'I'm so sorry! I asked the office clerk at my workplace to book this hotel, but it seems like there was a mistake and it didn't go through properly.'

Is there anyone in this world stupid enough to ask their office clerk to book a hotel for a date with a girl they met on a matching app?

I thought to myself that if such an idiot existed, I'd love to see their face—wait, he was right in front of me. Still, we drank, talked about trivial things, and eventually had our fun, so in that sense, I'm an idiot too. Maybe it's true that 'birds of a feather flock together.'

6. There's still more

Even though I went through with it as originally intended, Rui-kun was actually a total disaster in other ways too. You could totally be on 'Out Deluxe,' man.

I personally had been protecting myself with the stance that 'meeting people on apps means things like this can happen,' so it is what it is, but since it was genuinely infuriating, I noted his real name from his ID, checked out by myself, and went home.

Later, when I did some internet stalking based on his real name, I found out he was married. I sent a terrifying LINE message to Rui-kun, who had the nerve to keep contacting me, saying, 'I know you're married,' blocked him everywhere, and reported him to the app as a malicious user. I really hope he's gone for good now. It was so messed up, I'm dead.

I just wanted to talk about an interesting guy I met on an app, but before I knew it, it turned into a story about a top-tier piece of trash, and I'm sorry that it ended up being an incredibly hard-to-read post that somehow exceeded 2,500 characters.
It was fun, so if I feel like it, I'd like to write about episodes with other guys too.

Thank you for reading this far. See you later.