I'm Not That Kind: Episode 11 | A Household Doesn't Run on Love Alone

A household doesn't run on love alone.

I used to think it was a little different.

You're together because you love each other.
You support each other.
You care for each other.

I thought that those things piled up
to become a household.

Of course, that's part of it too.

But in reality,
it was much more about daily life.

Laundry.
Meals.
Daycare preparations.
Money.
Time.
Physical stamina.

Every day, small tasks come flowing in.

Even when you finish them, more come.

One night.

I was folding the laundry.

My husband was watching the kids.

Just a scene like that.

But, that's when I thought,

"Ah, our household is running right now."

It wasn't that I felt love.

It was closer to coordination.

A household is not something
that can be maintained by emotions alone.

Someone moves,
someone supports,
and somehow it keeps running.

And that "somehow" is,
usually hard to see.

Nameless tasks.

Changing the toilet paper roll.
Checking daycare notices.
Putting away clothes that have been outgrown.

If they don't get done, it's a problem.

But,
there's no applause for doing them.

I used to be frustrated by that invisibility.

Why doesn't anyone notice?
Why is it always me?

But now, my perspective has changed a little.

A home,
doesn't run because someone is perfect.

It's just that,
whoever can move that day fills in the gaps.

Of course, there are days when it's lopsided.

There are days when I'm the only one doing anything.

And there are days when it's the other way around.

It will never be perfectly equal.

That's exactly why,
thinking about it only in terms of love makes it painful.

A home,
is something much more mundane.

Today, too,
laundry will pile up, and
I'll make dinner.

There's nothing special about it.

But, through that repetition,
we are somehow managing to live properly.

I think that's enough.