Diary of My Mother with Dementia: Hospitalization Part 5
Thursday, October 24, 2024
My mother (83) is transferring from Hospital B to Care Facility C.
9:30 AM. My father (90) and I arrived at the hospital by shuttle car to accompany her.
The receptionist told us to wait in the lobby.
Since she is being discharged from Hospital B, we have to settle the bill today.
I had intended to pack my mother's things since she cannot do it herself, but... I was told a nursing taxi was scheduled for 10:00 AM. Hospital B had arranged this.
The nice thing about this lobby is that you can have tea or coffee for free from the vending machine. I got coffee for my father and myself in paper cups and we drank while we waited.
However, 9:45 AM came and went, and we still hadn't been called. I started to get anxious, so I went to the reception to ask. They just said, "Go ahead." I don't know what to make of that...
My father paid the bill.
The August and September bills were already paid, and today is October 24th. It was just under 250,000 yen for 24 days. I wonder how others in similar situations feel about this amount? (I assume it varies depending on the facility, region, and medical insurance.)
Once the payment was finished, we were allowed to enter the area on the second floor where my mother was hospitalized. They are still maintaining COVID-19 infection prevention measures.
When we reached the second floor, my mother was already dressed in her own clothes, wearing her reading glasses (a nurse had put them on her because the case was lost), and sitting in a wheelchair.
The nurses had packed her belongings and put them on a cart. They asked me to check the room, so I went to look. (I had been worried that I would have to do the packing myself, so I was relieved.)
My father was filling out paperwork on the floor.
When I returned and looked at my mother's face, she looked anxious.
"Mom, what's wrong?"
I said gently, taking her right hand and shaking it. A nurse she was familiar with also came over and spoke to her. I wonder if my mother even understands that she is transferring hospitals...
My mother was loaded into the nursing taxi while still in her wheelchair. My father and I got in as well.
The deputy director, who had been in charge, came out to see us off. Since there were four bags of luggage, he even helped load them. I can't help but suspect it's because they dislocated her hip (during a diaper change)...
Once we started, the nursing taxi drove through familiar scenery.
I tried to talk to my mother as much as possible.
"Look, that's [Name of school] (my high school)."
"Look, there are so many goldenrod flowers."
It was the first time in 25 days that my mother had seen the outside world. She couldn't turn her neck much, but she tried to look. She seemed to recognize the goldenrod and reacted to it. She doesn't seem to be able to say much.
Before she had dementia, my mother was curious, talkative, had many friends, and loved plants...
Dementia has changed my mother so much...
We arrived at Facility C, where she is transferring, in about 15 minutes.
My father and I went through the procedures, which included various explanations and filling out paperwork. As always, it took quite a long time.
My mother was taken to the same room in her wheelchair, but they immediately put a cotton swab in her nose for a COVID test. My mother looked surprised and became very upset...
That was when it started. My mother's mood soured all at once.
"I didn't know."
"I wasn't told."
She started saying things like that, meaning she felt she had been brought to a new place suddenly without any explanation.
From her perspective, that must be true. Every time we visited, my father, my sister, and I would repeat the explanation, but since my mother forgets that she is transferring, it's as if she's hearing it for the first time...
Finally, my mother started getting angry at my father.
"I wasn't told," my mother said.
She kept repeating it, so my father finally retorted.
"I told you," he said.
My father kept repeating that, and they started arguing.
The nurses, social workers, and counselors in the room all listened in silence.
I hesitated whether to stop my father. Couldn't he say it a bit more gently? My father, born in the early Showa era, is usually quiet and not good with words.
Finally, a nurse moved my mother's wheelchair to take her out of the room.
Oh, even though I won't be able to see Mom for a while!
I said to my mother,
"Mom, don't be angry. We won't be able to see each other."
My mother looked at me for a moment, but her anger was greater. She seemed to want to tell me that it was my father's fault. At that moment, my mother turned toward my father and stuck her tongue out at him. It was just like a child.
However, this is also a playful gesture that my grandmother and mother have had for a long time.
I had no choice but to watch my mother being taken away.
My mother is wearing a brace on her dislocated right hip.
She cannot come home until this is removed. This is because she cannot take it off by herself, and it must be removed every time she uses the toilet.
She had the brace put on August 1st, and the doctor at Hospital A said it couldn't be removed for three months, so three months will be up in a few days.
Facility C, where she will be staying from today, also has walking rehabilitation. However, compared to Hospital B, which specialized in rehabilitation, the rehabilitation time is said to be much less.
My mother's dementia is also progressing...
I want to bring her home at least once. My father, my sister, and I all feel the same way. But...
What will happen from here on out?
※ Timeline of my mother's hospitalization
July 8: Hip surgery at Hospital A; fracture occurred during the procedure.
July 26: Transferred to Hospital B (rehabilitation hospital); dislocated hip that night during a diaper change.
July 27: Returned to Hospital A (where surgery was performed) by ambulance.
August 1: Brace put on leg (told it cannot be removed for three months).
August 30: Transferred to Hospital B (rehabilitation hospital).
October 24: Transferred to Facility C (geriatric health services facility).