'Kindness is not for others' — Being scolded, crying, and yet experiencing the warmest days of my life
'Kindness is not for others'
I learned the meaning of this phrase as a 'way of life' from a 75-year-old woman.
Everything important about being a banker, and being a human being, was packed into that encounter.
—
After graduating from university, I joined a regional bank as a new graduate.
'I want to be useful to the community,' 'I want to do work where I can connect with people's hearts'—
That was the world I dove into with enthusiasm, carrying those thoughts in my heart.
However, reality was not so sweet.
An unfamiliar land. A massive amount of work. Strict quotas.
If I couldn't produce results, I was scolded by my superiors. My confidence wore thin, and my days were spent chasing vanity.
In my third year at the bank, I was filled with impatience and irritation.
—
It was then that I was assigned to handle the woman who held the most deposits at the branch.
She was 75 years old. A long-time client, and previous account managers had said, 'Once you make her angry, it's over.'
Inside, my legs were shaking.
In fact, I was scolded many times for being late or making procedural mistakes.
At my worst, she threatened to cancel all her transactions, and I had to go with the branch manager to apologize.
'I want to change who is in charge...'
I seriously thought that.
However, I didn't run away. I visited her many times, bowed my head, and continued to engage in dialogue.
Little by little, our relationship began to change.
—
One day, she said to me:
'Have you had lunch? If you'd like, you should eat before you go.'
That was the start of us having lunch together once a week.
She would treat me to home-cooked meals, we would eat with her younger sister, and I was even invited to her apartment in Tokyo.
We had moved beyond the framework of 'banker and customer' and had become like relatives.
—
One day, she casually remarked:
'Kindness is not for others. The kindness you show to people will always come back to you.'
At first, I just thought, 'That's a nice saying.'
But after seeing her treat delivery workers and repairmen with the same kindness, offering them drinks and snacks time and time again,
I began to understand the 'meaning' of those words with my heart.
—
My sales stance changed completely.
Instead of 'selling,' I started thinking about 'what would be beneficial for the other person.'
I focused on imagining the customer's life, staying close to their daily needs, and making proposals from the heart.
As a result, trust begat trust,
I became a central salesperson at the branch, and eventually, I was able to achieve results that placed me in the top 10 for the entire bank.
Of course, I put in the effort.
But the catalyst was undoubtedly those words and that encounter with her.
—
One day, I received a sudden transfer order.
When the branch manager told me as soon as I arrived at work, I felt a hollow void in my chest.
The first person I called was that woman.
'Thank you... thank you so much...'
I couldn't speak through my tears.
On the other end of the line, she was crying too.
—
Later, they held a farewell party for me at the branch.
The days I was scolded,
The days we ate lunch or bento boxes together,
The time we spent talking at drinking parties,
Looking back, everything felt like a treasure.
'I want to repay her somehow.'
Thinking that, I picked up a brush pen and wrote a letter.
I wrote down all my memories and gratitude in clumsy handwriting.
When I handed it to her, she gave me the gentlest smile I had ever seen.
'Perhaps this is what it means to be useful to others.'
At that moment, I truly felt that.
—
After that, I worked at my new location and then left the bank.
Even now, as I walk a different path, the time I spent with her is the origin of my life.
It has been 7 years since I left the bank. I still meet her occasionally.
When my child was born, she even went out of her way to send us baby clothes.
—
I changed after encountering those words.
'Kindness is not for others'—
Devoting yourself to others is not a loss.
It comes back around and enriches your own life.
And above all,
That kindness continues to live on within you forever.
—
A single encounter or a single word can change a person and change their life.
Have you ever encountered such words? If you'd like, please let me know in the comments section.
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