[How to Build Your Life from Age 36] #2 A Single Ray of Light Found in Despair. The 'One Habit' That Led Me Out of the Birdcage
Until I was 36, I was just a full-time housewife who painted as a hobby.
That changed when I became an illustrator, then a manga artist at 46, an interview writer at 51, and before I knew it, I had published four books, taught at NHK, and was writing columns for newspapers and television.
I would like to write, little by little, about the things I kept in mind, did, and did not do over these past 20 years.
I wrote about the background to that in my previous article.
Today, I want to write about a few events that became major catalysts for transforming the person I am today.
The reason I was in the world of 'ascetic' handicrafts
Twenty years ago (when I was 36), I was creating 'detailed paintings', specifically botanical art (a type of natural history illustration) and painting on Western-style tableware.
For example, painting on Western tableware is roughly like this.
(You can skip this part if you like, but for the sake of comparison later, I want you to at least remember the image of this picture.)
These works are still in my home, and even looking at them now, they are quite impressive, but I rarely use them. They only make a quiet appearance on the rare occasion when I buy a slightly expensive cake.
Past experiences live on in the present—respect for detailed handicrafts
Currently, as an interview writer, I sometimes interview people who are carrying on traditions in the field of traditional crafts. The reason I have endless respect for such people is none other than the fact that I myself have experienced the discipline of this craft world firsthand.
So why did I place myself in this incredibly tedious (pardon me) world of painting and fine detail? It is certainly true that I loved it, but thinking about it now, perhaps I was 'under a curse'.
The 18-year-old curse that kept me bound
That 'curse' goes back even further, 18 years before that (38 years ago from now).
When I was 18, I was approached by a local TV station crew while traveling and ended up being a plant for a 'fortune-telling house' segment in their program.
After having my palm read, this is what I was told:
'You must not give up painting. You will surely make something of it. However, your talent is not so much about 'drawing unique things to get attention,' but rather 'drawing carefully and steadily'.'
Not only that, but as I was leaving, the fortune teller grabbed my arm and“Never, ever stop drawing.”she insisted.
However, I forgot all about that after that.
A Life Plan Ruined by Country Living
When a friend got married at 23 just as the fortune teller had predicted, our group was buzzing, thinking, 'Could that fortune actually be true?'
It was only natural that when I got married at 25 and discovered porcelain painting and miniature painting, I would force myself to find an 'answer,' thinking, 'Could this be the art of drawing carefully and diligently...?'
However, by the time I had been doing it for 10 years, I was exhausted. There was a reason. I hadlost sight of my goal.
My goal in my early 30s was to become a teacher of botanical art or porcelain painting. But I was living in the countryside, nearly two hours away from Tokyo.
Porcelain painting is incredibly expensive, and the tuition fees are high. If I opened such a class in this town, who on earth would come to learn...?
I felt that my life had completely hit a dead end.
The Sadness of Not Being Needed by Anyone
To summarize everything up to this point, it feels like, 'I was told by a fortune teller that I would succeed with art that involves drawing carefully and in detail, so I started learning porcelain painting and miniature painting. However, I couldn't see any future at all, and I hit a dead end.'
'Hitting a dead end' might sound like an exaggeration. I was well-off financially, and I certainly didn't have to work if I didn't want to.
However, my husband was extremely busy and rarely ate at home on weekdays, and he wouldn't be inconvenienced at all if I weren't there. I wondered how I could possibly live positively while carrying the feeling that I wasn't needed by anyone.
The 'Chick Diary' I Started on a Blog🐤
As a result, I made a decision. To keep my heart from dying in the midst of those painful days, I wouldfind at least one 'interesting thing' every single day.
In the year I turned 34, blog services started in Japan. That was where I began drawing a 'Chick Picture Diary' on my blog, using the 'interesting things' I had found as material.
A chick, this is it, this.
'What on earth is this!'
Huh? The gap between this and the elegant, beautiful world in the previous sections is too wide to follow? ...I am terribly sorry.
But this was my only support during those painful days.
Who would have thought that this little one would take me so far away (laughs).
Yes, writing this chick diary was the trigger that started my life moving in an unexpected direction.
More on that next time.
Continue here
A magazine collecting notes that contain all the know-how I cultivated as a freelancer for 20 years
A magazine compiling notes written about how to go about publishing
A magazine compiling this series 🐤
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