I believed things would get easier when they grew up. That wasn't the case.

I was sure things would get easier once the kids grew up.
Believing that, I kept encouraging myself by saying, 'Just for now. Just for now.'
But before I knew it, I'm still living days where I'm only spoken to when I'm trying to focus.
I'm writing about the realistic daily life of a freelance mother, where joy and trouble coexist.

This article is the 29th in the 'Freelance Daily Life' series.
▼Click here for the previous one

I believed things would get easier when the kids grew up

I believed things would get easier when the kids grew up.

So, when the kids were small, I would encourage myself by saying,
'Just for now. Just for now.'
The kids grew up.

And now...

I'm still thinking,
'Just for now. Just for now.'
Wait, what?!

Why???

Honestly, it's hard when I'm spoken to while I'm trying to focus

'Hey, hey, listen to this.'
'I want you to praise me.'

The kids take turns talking to me.

Even though I'm focused on my computer.

In that moment, my concentration breaks.
The thoughts I was building up in my head are cut off.

After being interrupted,
it takes a lot of energy to get back to where I was.

When I'm focused, I just wish,
please, don't talk to me.
That's how I feel.

But I'm happy that they talk to me

I am happy that they talk to me.

Even though they are university, high school, and middle school students, they all talk to me a lot.
Of course, there are probably things they don't tell their parents.

Still, as a mother, I'm happy that they talk to me so much.

But.
Now that they've grown up and our daily schedules are all different,
I almost never have time to myself.

It's become normal for someone to be at home.

My eldest daughter, who is in university, sometimes goes to school in the afternoon.
My second daughter often studies at home in the morning, and my eldest son comes home in the evening.
So, except for when I'm sleeping, someone or other is always talking to me.

Things that happened today.

Things they want praise for.
Random chatter.
As a mother, honestly, I'm happy.

But as a professional, it's a problem.
My daily life right now is,


'happiness' and 'trouble' existing at the same time.

Even after they grew up, my worries haven't really changed

I suddenly realized.

This is the same worry I had when the kids were small, isn't it?

'I want to focus, but I can't.'
'I don't have any time for myself.'

Even though the kids grew up, my worries hadn't changed.

Back then, I believed,
'It will get easier when they grow up.'
But... surprisingly, that wasn't the case (laughs).

I am taking measures, but...

Of course, I am taking measures.

'I'm trying to focus right now, so please don't talk to me.'

Since they are all big, they follow the rule properly.

...However.
A few hours later, they've forgotten (laughs).

That's just how families are.

Summary | Maybe this is a luxury problem

Well, let's just say this is fine.

'Just for now. Just for now.'
Maybe the time I'm thinking that is the best part.

The countdown until I graduate from parenting has begun.
Maybe having them talk to me so much is a luxury problem.

Writing while feeling both 'happy' and 'troubled'.
This is my style right now.

Accepting that, I'll go on writing happily today too.

This article was the 29th in the 'Freelance Daily Life' series.
▶Next, the 30th is here
▶The 1st is here


▼Click here for the overview of this series

★I would be happy if you could also read this series★

Thank you so much for reading until the end!
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