Are you overwhelmed by others' emotions?! How to break free from 'empathy fatigue'

● Are you being swallowed up by other people's feelings?

“I feel drained because my coworker seems so miserable.”
“I was supposed to be listening to a friend's problem, but before I knew it, I was the one who felt exhausted.”
“When I look at social media, my heart feels restless and I can't sleep.”
If you have had experiences like these, it might be 'empathy fatigue'.

The more sensitive you are to other people's pain, the more you feel their negative emotions as if they were your own, which wears your heart down.
However, this is proof of your 'kindness' and 'empathy'. It is by no means a bad thing.

In this article, we will explain the following in an easy-to-understand and practical way:
・What is empathy fatigue?
・Why are kind people more prone to it?
・Concrete ways to break free and self-care you can do daily

We hope this will be a hint for protecting your own heart without being swayed by the emotions of others.

● What is empathy fatigue? Its true nature and mechanism

“Empathy fatigue” refers to a state where you become mentally and physically exhausted from feeling other people's emotions and pain too intensely.
While it is a concept often highlighted in jobs that involve deep human interaction, such as healthcare and nursing, it has recently spread to the general public as well.
In our modern lives, through social media, remote work, and human relationships, we have more opportunities to encounter the emotions of others than we might imagine.

● Why are 'kind people' more prone to it?

People who are prone to empathy fatigue share common personality traits.・They can put themselves in others' shoes・They think, 'If I just endure it, it will be fine'・They cannot leave problems alone・They feel it is their fault when others are in a bad mood

While these are inherently wonderful qualities, the boundaries of emotions tend to become blurred, and the feelings of others 'invade' your own.
Especially in Japan, there is a deeply rooted culture where 'reading the air' and 'sensing' are considered virtues, which can unknowingly promote empathy fatigue.

● Empathy fatigue from the perspective of neuroscience

Our brains have nerve cells called 'mirror neurons'.

This is a mechanism where the brain reacts as if you were experiencing the event yourself when you see someone else's facial expressions, tone of voice, or gestures.

For example, 'when you see someone sad, you feel sad too,' or 'when someone is irritated, you feel restless.' In fact, this is a natural reaction of the brain.
However, if you do not control it, you will lose track of your own emotions and your heart will burn out.

● Things you can do starting today! How to break free from 'empathy fatigue'

⑴ 'Separate' your own emotions from those of others

The first step to breaking free from empathy fatigue is to consciously separate, 'Is this my own emotion? Or is it someone else's emotion?'

《 Concrete examples 》
・When you feel uneasy, write it down on paper
・Try asking yourself, 'Is this my problem?'
・Make a note of the moments when you were 'swallowed' by the other person's words
These tasks serve as training to clarify the boundaries of your emotions.

⑵ Give 'invisible stress' an outline with words

The troublesome part of empathy fatigue is the state of 'I don't know why, but I'm just tired.'
In such cases, it is effective to 'put into words' the emotions inside your heart.

For example,
・"I was affected by that person's bad mood."
・"I actually wanted to say no, but I felt pressured and said yes."
etc.

By putting these into words, you can organize the stress that was previously invisible and make it easier to control your emotions.

(3) Consciously set aside time to prioritize your own emotions

This does not mean "be selfish," but rather that you should prioritize having time where you can feel comfortable.

For example,
・Take 5 minutes in the morning to breathe deeply in a quiet space
・Put your smartphone away before bed at night and listen to your favorite music
・Ask yourself, "What did I feel today?"

Incorporating even one such "time just for yourself" every day will help prevent empathy fatigue.

● Recommended support items

(1) "Aroma mist" to switch your brain with scent

(2) "Workbook" to heal yourself

● Summary: Empathy can also be a "strength"

Empathy fatigue is the "flip side of kindness."
That is precisely why you need to maintain your own heart.

・Other people's emotions: "Feel them, but don't carry them."
・Properly handling your own emotions is true kindness.
・Daily small acts of self-care will save you from empathy fatigue.

Your empathy is undoubtedly a valuable talent.
However, to make the most of it, the "ability to protect yourself" is just as important.

※ This column was created with the help of AI.