Six months since the school refusal began: My son's pace and Mom's new challenge

Thank you as always. This is Halfin.

I'd like to talk about how my son has been doing lately during his school refusal, and about the future of my YouTube channel.

Lately, my son has often been waking up after his older sister and brother have already left for school.
From there, he eats breakfast, gets ready, and I take him to school around 9:00 AM.
That has become our routine for now.

At school, he spends his time in a separate room rather than the classroom.
Support teachers are by his side, helping him move through the day's activities at his own pace.

I almost never hear him say things like, "I did this today" or "It was like this" in his own words.

I communicate with his teachers through a contact notebook, which is how I learn about how he is doing at school.
Even when I look at the notebook and say to my son, "So you did such-and-such today, huh?"

"Huh? Did I?"
"I don't know."
"I forgot."

Those are almost always his replies.

But today, while I was driving him to school, he suddenly said,
"I've been able to go lately."

I replied,
"It seems like this current way of doing things suits you, doesn't it?"

That he doesn't dislike his current activities.
That he feels even a little bit positive about them.
Just hearing those words made me feel a little relieved.

He was able to go to school at his own pace this week as well.

Lately, I really feel like his expression has become brighter.

Before, even when he went to school, there were times when he couldn't put on his indoor shoes at the shoe locker or would lie down on the floor.
There were many days when it took a long time to get from there to the separate room or the classroom.

But now, he is gradually becoming more stable.

It has been six months since the school refusal began.
I have had many discussions with the teachers, and we have come this far through trial and error while watching how my son is doing.

I can't say "everything is fine now" just yet.
But I don't think these past six months, which we spent searching for a way that suits my son, were in vain at all.

From here on out, I want to continue without rushing, without comparing him to others, and while valuing my son's pace.

Even in the midst of all this, I'm a mom who does what she wants to do.

I am currently taking on the challenge of a side job as well.
I upload to YouTube twice a week, on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

I've tried making LINE stickers of my beloved cat Sally, who appears in my YouTube videos, and I've also opened a consultation service on Coconala.

I'm the type of person who gets depressed if I spend all my time thinking about my son or posting about it every single day.

That's exactly why I do what I love.
I eat what I love.
I also cherish my own pleasures.

I make a conscious effort to spend my days like that.

I also work a part-time job on weekdays.
While I'm working, I can focus on what's right in front of me, so I don't have to overthink things.
Perhaps it's also a good change of pace for me.

Right now, I'm struggling with the difficulty of motivating others, but I'm learning every day.
But I'm having a good time.

In the end, I think the scenery you see changes depending on your state of mind.

My son's experiences, my challenges with side jobs, and my success stories.
Someday, I want to be someone who can share those with people who need them.

I believe this is surely a time of trial for that purpose.
Please support me 💛