The kindness of the me who lived by acting tough, as taught by the bougainvillea
In the evening, I lean back against the backrest of a dim chair in the corner of the room.
I have finished the roles expected of me for another day.
A flawless smile for the outside world.
The reliable, mature self I presented whenever I was needed.
Absorbing the expectations of those around me and the small frictions of daily life,
my exterior has hardened into a perfect shape before I knew it.
Everyone thinks that is my true self.
And I, too, have desperately maintained that stubborn outline,
believing that I had to be that way.
But the real me is,
in the deepest, quietest place within that hard shell.
What is there is,
a soft, simple, and true heart that is mine alone,
with no need for words.
A precious place I never want anyone to trample upon.
Just to keep it from being broken,
I wore the brilliant color of a strong self on the outside,
desperately using it as a shield.
I suddenly realize that.
It is not that a dramatic change occurs,
nor that the things I held tight are neatly unraveled.
But simply,
I find my clumsy self somehow endearing and it all falls into place,
thinking, 'Ah, I was acting so tough just to protect my true heart.'
Tomorrow, I will likely wear this outer self and smile just the same.
It is not as if everything will change all at once.
But I was able to acknowledge that small, soft light hidden inside me,
as something precious, once again, on my own.
This is fine.
Thinking that, in the dim light,
I simply let out one deep, warm sigh.
Before turning off the room lights, I let out one more deep breath of the tension I had been holding.
May you return to your gentlest, true self tonight.
🌸Gratitude🌸
Thank you for always welcoming me into your wonderful magazine.
I am truly happy that the words I have spun have connected to new places and provided an opportunity to reach someone's heart once again.
🌸Budou Spark-san
Thank you for welcoming me so many times.
🌸Ai-san💗I Counseling Room Therapist-san
🌸Tebokko-san
🌸Midori Donguri-san
🌸Fuafua Korone-san
🌸Yurari🌸🫧 🫶✨-san
🌸Erii-san
🌸Yura-san
🌸Noriko Matsumoto Ivory-san
Thank you so much for connecting me with many new readers through your warm introductions.
🌸Yurari🌸🫧 🫶✨-san
Under any sky, may you always be yourself.
hanatoshiki