[Living by Your Own Standards Day 4] The True Nature of the Psychology Behind Feeling Down When Comparing Yourself to Others

This is Tomo.

Comparing yourself to others and feeling down. I think everyone has had that experience.
I think everyone has had that experience.

・Feeling inferior after looking at social media
・Feeling anxious about a colleague's achievements
・Blaming yourself for not being able to do things like that person

But is it really because you are "inferior"?

The true nature of comparison is "I actually want to do that too"

When you feel uneasy after comparing yourself to others,
there is often a hidden desire deep within that emotion: "I actually want to do that too."

For example—
・Envious of people who work freely → I want to work freely too
・Annoyed by people who are full of confidence → I want to have confidence too

You compare and feel down because you want to be like that person.
But if you deny that, it only strengthens your self-rejection.

Comparison is not a bad thing

Comparing yourself is not inherently bad.
The problem is concluding "therefore I am no good" based on that comparison.

When you find yourself comparing,
try to explore "what about that person attracted you?"
and "what are you looking for?"

Hidden there are yourtrue desiresandthe version of yourself you want to become.

About me (Self-introduction)

■ Tomo
・Born in 1983
・Balancing a corporate job while working in the field of mental growth
・Learned psychology and coaching after experiencing adjustment disorder
・Currently researching and sharing about "living by your own standards"

Next time preview

[Living by Your Own Standards Day 5]
"Which should you cultivate: external validation or self-validation?"
→ Tips for not being swayed by the desire to be recognized.

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