Our Sickness of Continuing to Repair Remote Controls That Aren't Broken Yet
"Are you satisfied with your life?"
When I ask myself that question, I realize that behind the words "well, I guess so," there is an indelible, hazy feeling clinging to me.
It's not that there is any great misfortune. My daily life is peaceful.
Yet, why is my heart not fulfilled?
This morning, the moment I picked up the remote for the ceiling fan, I caught a "bug in my thinking" lurking within me.
A 0.1-millimeter sense of discomfort: A play-by-play of my brain regarding the remote
My home has a sloped ceiling, and a ceiling fan is essential for air conditioning efficiency. I turn on the heater and pick up the remote to turn on the fan. In those few seconds, these thoughts raced through my brain:
"If this remote breaks, will I have to replace the whole unit?"
"I should look up later if I can buy just the remote."
Surprisingly, the remote is not broken at all.
For a problem that hasn't even happened in this moment, I was allocating precious thinking resources and, incredibly, was even about to take the action of "investigating."
The abandonment of the present in the name of "insurance"
A part of me said to myself:
"Shouldn't you think about that after it breaks?"
It was a shock.
My thought pattern is always this.
* Preparing this now for the sake of the future.
* Dedicating my day off to this for the sake of next week.
At first glance, it looks like "strategic preparation." However, this thinking knows no bounds. It is a state of constantly taking out excessive "insurance" on life, so to speak, by continuing to prepare for an "uncertain future" no matter how far I go.
What happened as a result?
My life became stable, but the price I paid was the death of my sensitivity to 'enjoying this very moment'.
Strategic Degradation: 'Deliberately' Discarding Preparation for the Future
This realization has become an important update to my 'self-management techniques'.
I have decided to pose this question to the thoughts that are constantly circulating.
'Is this for this very moment? Or is it preparation for an uncertain future?'
As an adult, preparation for the future is necessary. However, if that balance is lost, you will spend your whole life whittling away the present for the sake of 'unseen anxieties'.
Today, I have decided to use these 15 minutes for a 'tangible present,' even if it means deliberately sacrificing quality or efficiency. I want to build up a 'tangible present' where I can laugh and talk about my raw failures in front of the FM Okayama microphone.
Do not kill today for the sake of an uncertain future.
Now, under the ceiling fan, I think I will begin the best 'present'.
[Draft Post for X]
Even after updating every day for 170 days, bugs in my thinking still appear. This morning, I was horrified to find myself holding a remote control that wasn't even broken, worrying about 'replacing it when it breaks.'
I am taking out too much 'insurance' for the future and not fully using this very moment. Preparation is important, but it is no reason to ruin today. Today, I will live in the 'now'.
#SelfManagementTechniques #OrganizingThoughts