Monologue of a Lost Gadget Believer

I love gadgets. Before I know it, I'm researching information on new devices and making it a habit to think about what to bring when I go out. Even though the frequency of my outings has decreased recently, this habit shows no signs of going away. Even in situations where they aren't particularly necessary in daily life, stuffing tablets and laptops into my bag 'just in case' is typical behavior for me.

I rarely use them when I'm out. Still, I imagine the moment when something happens and I can think, 'I'm glad I brought it.' For example, if work suddenly comes up at a cafe, it's much more efficient to handle it with the iPad I brought than to try to manage with just a smartphone. However, in reality, such situations only happen a few times a year. Is it some kind of pathological obsession that I can't feel at ease unless I carry them around?

I sometimes self-deprecatingly call myself a 'gadget fool.' In the corner of my mind, I ask myself, 'Do I really need this?' but somewhere in my heart, the feeling of 'I still want to take it' wins out. Recently, finding the 'optimal setup' for going out has become a hobby. I want a lightweight tablet model. I want to choose a charger that is light and compact. And I've even started buying bags that are optimized for gadgets.

The time I spend preparing to go out is the most fun. The time spent choosing charging cables, mobile batteries, and earphones, and thinking about what is necessary, is in a sense more exciting than the trip itself. The joy of lining up my belongings and finding the perfect pouch that fits everything is irreplaceable.

As I continue these actions, I have gradually come to understand what I am looking for. Perhaps it's not so much that I love gadgets, but that I love the act of 'preparing' itself. It may be an expression of my desire to control things, or perhaps an instinctive urge to prepare for unknown events.

However, sometimes I want to reconsider the joy of being 'lightweight.' Spending a day with no plans and only the bare minimum of belongings. I am beginning to feel that that is also a kind of luxury. But even as I think that, it's just like me to still sneak a small gadget into my bag.

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