How to be Happy: "Being Scolded"

The top image is a "thistle".
Its flower language is "independence" and "strictness".

It has thorns that hurt if you touch them.

But precisely because it has those thorns,
it cannot be easily trampled upon.

I feel that is somewhat similar
to being scolded.

♧♣︎

The other day,
a colleague was being scolded.

Since I wasn't involved,
I was listening from a little distance away, but
the atmosphere inevitably became heavy.

The person being scolded looked miserable, and
I, watching, also felt a bit uncomfortable.

If possible,
I wish for a world where no one gets scolded.

To be honest,
I would rather be praised than scolded.

So I thought about it.
Could we eliminate "scolding" from humanity?

For example, in a company,
we could create a department called the "Praise Department".
If someone makes a mistake, they would say,

"This document has all the numbers wrong, but
the font is easy to read," and praise them.
To someone who missed a deadline, they would say,
"You didn't make the deadline, but

it looks like you slept well last night," and praise them.
To someone who made a major mistake, they would say,
"It takes talent to make a mistake this grand," and praise them.
It is a very gentle world

where no one gets hurt.
I imagined it for a while, but
the company would probably go bankrupt.

It seems people who scold are necessary after all.
Of course, reality is different.
People make mistakes.
They also misunderstand things.
That is why, at times,

we get cautioned or

scolded.
I would like to avoid it if possible, but

looking back,
there were many things I "realized"
because I was scolded.

I thought I was doing things properly,
but in reality, that wasn't the case.
That happens often.
People think they see themselves clearly,

but surprisingly, they don't.
That is why the words of others are necessary.

Of course,

this is different from yelling or
denigrating someone's character.

That is neither education nor guidance.

But,
"That part is wrong"
"You should do it this way next time"

these words

contain perspectives you cannot see yourself.
When you think about it,
the older you get, the fewer opportunities you have to be scolded.
Because it is a hassle.
Because you can just stay silent and distance yourself

without going out of your way to point things out.
That is precisely why

people who tell you things in earnest are precious.
Even if it hurts to hear in the moment,
when you look back on it later,

you find that you were helped by those words.
Watching my colleague being scolded,

I was thinking about such things.
Being scolded is painful.
It is painful like the thorns of a thistle.

But,
thanks to that pain,

there are times when you can correct the direction you are heading.

How to be happy.

That is,
not to think of being scolded as a misfortune.
Within words that are hard to hear,

a gift for your future self

is sometimes hidden.

Books that influenced me in writing this article

"Can't You Scold Me Better If You're Going To?" by Naoki Yoshimura

Everyone dislikes being scolded.

However, scolding is not easy either.

This book makes you think about "how to scold"—not to hurt the other person, but to convey your wishes for their growth.

I wrote this article from the perspective of the "one being scolded," but by the time I finished reading, I also realized the difficulty of being the "one who scolds."

It is a book that makes you want to rethink how you interact with others.
I highly recommend it.

I have also compiled other "How to be Happy" flowers
at the link below.
Please take as many as you need🍀

Thank you for reading until the end.
I hope to see you in another article.
🍀May you be happy🍀