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"Moving Forward While Lost": Why I Started Coding

Chill｜人生後半、進化中

🎈Introduction: What it means to move forward while lost

It has been over a year and a half since I started studying coding. There were days when I worked so hard I felt like I was going to break. Even so, because I kept going, there are things I have come to see.

I would like to write a little about what I am feeling now and the direction I intend to head in from here.



🪄A step taken from "retirement age" and "anxiety"

It was December 2023, right after I had surgery for an illness, that I decided I wanted to become a markup engineer or an HTML coder.

The trigger was the unfair treatment of non-regular employees. And the word "retirement age" that I could see looming in the not-too-distant future.
A pension alone is not enough to feel secure. If that's the case, if I could use my own experience and hands to earn even a little income... With that thought, I felt, "Web development might be something I'd like to try."

I started studying HTML and CSS from absolutely zero knowledge.


✨Wanting to make use of English too: To an overseas web design course

"If I'm going to do it, I want to make use of my English too."
Thinking that, I decided to challenge myself with an online web design course in English taught by an instructor from abroad.

19:30 to 22:30 on weekdays, 5 days a week. For about 3 months.
Days spent rushing home after work and participating in class with barely any time for dinner. It was harder than I imagined, but the rewards were just as great, and it became a valuable experience where I could learn both English and the Web.


✈️The world of expression expands by starting note

I started note with the idea that I "wanted to leave a record of my learning."
But when I actually started writing, my thoughts overflowed, with me wanting to write this and convey that.

Before I knew it, the number of magazines had increased, and there are times when I feel like everything is half-finished.

And while there are times I can't keep up with everything, it also became a trigger for me to realize that "I love to write."


🧩 My coding activities are also moving forward, little by little

I am still continuing with Web development, which was my original goal.
My goal remains the same: to become a markup engineer or an HTML coder.

Currently, I have created a few simple sample sites and have also started selling templates (though sales are still at zero...).
I hope to connect this to future sales by introducing templates and suggesting how to use them on note as well.


👣 Always lost in life. But that's me, too

Sometimes, I get confused myself, wondering, "What is it that I want to do?"
There are days when I worry that I should be more focused, as my note magazines keep increasing.

But,the feeling that "I want to try this and that right now" is also a definite part of who I am.
Perhaps I have a tendency to "live in a rush."

What am I in such a hurry for...?
Sometimes I think, "Maybe I won't live a long life." That is precisely whyI want to do what I can now, while I still can. That is how I feel.


🌱 How to deal with sensitivity

Recently, I read an article about HSP (Highly Sensitive Person) and started to feel, "Maybe I am one too."

I can't leave things that catch my interest alone, and my heart wanders here and there. Sometimes I think of myself as "troublesome," but I want to believe that this is also me.I want to accept that this is also me.

I believe that this time, where I feel like a lost child, is surely a necessary process for me.


🚲 I want to change, without rushing

The other day, against my wishes, it was decided that my current contract would end in a few months.
While I think, 'Maybe now is the time to change my life,' I also feel anxious about the reality of being unprepared and the wavering of my own feelings.

Even so, perhaps this 'time of feeling lost' is actually a step toward moving forward.
The moments when I can think that way are gradually increasing.


🎁 Closing: To You

To those trying to start something.
To those struggling because they have too many things they want to do.
To those who keep asking themselves, 'What do I really want to do?'

I would be happy if I could meet you through this note.


💻 Bonus: Introduction to the online school where I learned

I would like to introduce Kredo, an online school where you can learn web development in English.

If you are interested, please take a look 😊


Even if you are lost, if you can move forward one step at a time... surely that is enough.
May your day be wrapped in gentle moments.

Thank you for reading until the end ♪
Wishing you a wonderful life ✨


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