[A Turbulent Week Part 1] The day I received news of a death on the day of my performance. The reason I decided to sing anyway.

On the morning of the members' concert on the 18th, I received word that my aunt had passed away.
Having been close with my cousins since childhood, I had to perform while receiving a constant stream of messages about funeral arrangements and other details.

To be honest, my mind was not at peace.
Even so, that was the day I had decided to stand on stage.

This time, I was performing as part of a group as a student in Mr. Aoshima's course at the Tokyo Chamber Opera Theatre.

It was a performance with a different flow and atmosphere than usual, but it is strange how you can focus once you are on stage.

My honest impression is that it was fun.
I sang "The Doll Song" (Les oiseaux dans la charmille) from The Tales of Hoffmann.
I finally realized just before the performance why this piece, which I used to sing with sheer momentum when I was younger, is called a difficult one.
It requires connecting high notes while feeling the harmony as the tonality shifts intricately.
It is a piece that asks not "whether you can hit the notes," but "how you can make it work as music."


Somehow, and I really mean somehow, I managed to sing it through to the end.

For the past few years, I have been playing roles outside my natural vocal range, and I felt like I had lost sight of my own voice while focusing too much on "fulfilling my role."
Choosing this piece was also a challenge to regain that sense.
Life events and the timing of performances sometimes overlap in mysterious ways.

Even when things are not in order, I still stand on stage.
Perhaps that, too, is one of the choices I can make as I am now.

Lately, events that feel like turning points in my life have been following one after another.
I think I will write about them little by little.

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