The Armor of Adulthood

I look cold because I don't show my emotions.
I have never been able to like that about myself.
That is surely
proof that I held myself
over and over, telling myself 'don't cry'.

I was taught when I was little
that I must not envy others.

So I
never said 'I want it' or 'I'm frustrated'.
And now, more than when I was little,
I feel like I am suppressing even more.

Surely, though no one can see it,
I am wearing the armor of adulthood
that locks away my voice.

The armor is cold and heavy, but
inside it, there is still a warm heart.

When I try to put it into words,
my emotions overflow and I cannot speak.
My heart is still that of a child,
so,
I don't have to take it off just yet.

Just unbutton the chest a little
and try to feel the breeze.
Words might just spill out.
When they overflow,
I will praise myself,
saying, 'You were able to say it, me.'