Yokoshima Counseling Room #16: The time a note friend made a bizarre 'Actually, I was a pick-up artist' confession
From a note friend who has absolutely nothing to do with erotica
“Mayokichi, hey... reading about Rama-chan in the Yokoshima Counseling Room... I suddenly felt like confessing... actually... a long time ago, I was a pick-up artist too.”
That’s what he confessed to me.
“Huh?!”
“This is a photo from a long time ago.”
“Whoa!! He’s as handsome as an actor!”
Well, it’s a blurry photo, but he claimed he looked like Tetsuya Komuro when he was young, but that photo was
more like a needlessly high-spec handsome guy, like a slim-faced version of Masaharu Fukuyama in his prime
though. However, he said himself that now he’s just a “plain old man withered like a piece of driftwood,” and I don’t think that’s false modesty, since his personality is withered after all...
“I’ve sold up to1 million yen a monthin pick-up artist materials, I’ve worked as ahosttoo, and I’ve hit onalmost every womanat my companies and part-time jobs.”
“That’s even more of a scumbag move than Rama-chan!!”
(↑Rama-chan is apparently afraid of his relationships with women getting out of control, so he limits his one-night stands to the nightlife scene or women with secret accounts. No, that doesn’t make it okay, but... at least he’strying his best to exercise self-controlin his own way)
“I quit picking up women a long time ago, so please forgive me.”
“W-well... either way, it causes me zero actual harm, so I guess it’s fine, or rather, it has nothing to do with me, really. Is the pick-up artist population really that large? Oris it just that weirdos are drawn to me because I run an erotic account?…Oh my.”
“But you know. Now, when I hear stories aboutpick-up artistsorsecret accountsand such, instead of feeling envious, I only feelincredibly sorry for them…When I see pick-up artist guys, I feel like‘How pitiful, trying so hard at something so pointless…’”
“Huh, why?”
“Picking up women is, structurally speaking, a meeting between ‘someone who is lacking something’ and ‘someone who is lacking something.’ That’s why there’s never any satisfaction there. It’s like, it’s ‘nothingness.’”
“!!!! That’s... incredibly philosophical... it sounds deep, or maybe I don’t really get it... (But you clearly didn’t need to pick up women that intensely just to reach that conclusion! You’re a nuisance!!)”
And no matter how many hundreds of women you have sex with, it doesn't build confidence.
Huh?!?! W-why?! My impression was, well, women aside, you know, men would get quite a bit of confidence just from having so many partners who would do that sort of thing for free...
That's different. It doesn't build any confidence at all...
Tell me more about that!
I can't explain it well, but anyway, it doesn't build any confidence at all. It's the same for me, but guys who were socially awkward or gloomy and couldn't get any attention until around high school, once they become able tosuccessfully pick up women—well, in the early days, you do feel like you've gained some kind of confidence. I did feel thatmomentary sense of exhilarationat the time. But in the end, pick-up artistry doesn't give a person any confidence whatsoever.Pick-up artistry has absolutely no such benefit...
I-I-is that so... That reallygives one pause...
At this point, hearing this strange story, I almost felta sense of deep reflectionbut Tetsu-chan's next line completely ruined it.
So I've quit having sex.
You've... quit having sex?!
[By the way, Tetsu-chan is still in his 40s; he even said things like 'I don't even have gray hair!' so it's not that his libido has truly withered due to aging or that he's become unable to, but rather, he has quit sex in the same context asquitting smoking, for instance]
Yeah. My sex drive mostly disappeared around age 35 anyway. I mean,it's not even that pleasurableis it, sex? It justbecame too much of a hassle
...Hey... that's a case where you need to apologize to every single woman you've ever picked up, you know.
Why?! Why would I need to apologize!
(Ignoring him) ...Right, so, you've quit...
Meditation feels better than sex.
Meditation!!!
"Mayokichi, have you ever tried meditation?Meditation is great! It feels extremely good! Just so you know, I'm not into religion at all, okay?!"
"..."
"In conclusion,I just don't understand people who marry women."
"Are you an enlightened being or something!!"
"So, Mayokichi, marriage is reallycrap,isn't it? Don't you think so?"
"N-no... (Wait, I'm actually married myself)"
"Ah, before you try to refute me, Mayokichi, let me say this first: I'm not grateful for food made by women. I can cook rice incredibly well in a pot by myself. I can take care of my own cleaning and laundry. Having a woman in the house is incredibly annoying. I don't want to have pointless daily conversations with women either. I don't have any material desires, so traveling or shopping with women is a hassle."
"So what kind of life are you hoping for?"
"Rather than a hope, myactuallife right now ismeeting and talking to as few people as possible, eating rice I cooked deliciously in a pot on the gas stove with some fish, meditating, keeping my room with minimal furniture like a minimalist, and taking walks around the XX River at dusk.I guess that's the vibe."
Also, working is fun, I suppose. Being able to do things I couldn't do before, being creative, repeating trial and error... no, it's tough, but well,working is far more fun than sex now.
I mean, back in the day, I lived in a luxury apartment in Shibuya, lived extravagantly, traveled abroad with women, and bought brand-name goods, but it was honestly so empty..."
"I'm quite the shut-in myself, so I can't really talk, butyou're quite the hermityourself..."
"First of all, I just can't handle living a daily life with others."
"That's a conversation for before even talking about marriage."
"What was that! By the way, in my life so far,"Marriage is great"is something I havecompletely refutedevery single time!! Not a single married person has ever been able to beat my arguments!That's right, Mayokichi, you're married, aren't you? Then go ahead and present the merits of marriage to me as much as you want! I'm confident I can refute it immediately! Hahahaha!Come at me!"
"Tetsu-chan, you don't have to refute that..."
"Ehhhhh, we're not going to argue? (looks very bored)"
----------------P.S.-----------------
I really think that for many women, it's not about
sex,
but rather that through sex, they are actually seeking to be cherished enough that someone would dedicate their life to them as well.
That is why I believe that pick-up artists and guys with secret accounts are worthless to women.
That is why I will continue to basically openly and thoroughly criticize pick-up artists and guys with secret accounts, and I think it is the height of arrogance for them to even mistake themselves as beings who bring happiness to girls—it's just, 'are you stupid, that's insane'.
However.
The part where pick-up artists and guys with secret accounts say, 'By becoming someone who could approach and ask girls out, I broke free from being socially anxious and unable to take action'
is something
I can empathize with to some extent.
And if, in the context of having become someone who could stand on their own through those passing girls, they could suddenly feel a sense of gratitude in their hearts, thinking, 'In other words, maybe they made me happy,' then that doesn't really feel like a bad thing.
(No, even so, I have absolutely no intention of handing over my own precious daughter or anyone like that to them, and I definitely don't have any desire to get hooked by a pick-up artist myself. In short, since I wasn't the one who got hooked by them, it's someone else's problem, so I'm just empathizing and finding it interesting.)
But, somehow, not the female part of my heart, but my mischievous boyish part is impressed, like, 'Huh! Even though you were socially anxious, you were able to take that much action! You're pretty good!' in a way that makes me admire them.
Of course, I absolutely do not recommend hardcore, constant pick-up artists like Tetsu-chan or Rama-chan, but even the most serious people do things similar to picking up women, albeit rarely.
Like catching a wife once in a lifetime,
getting a job offer from a company,
or going on an overseas trip alone for the first time.
Not hurting others is also very, very important, but being aware of your own desires, and even if you are embarrassed or receive a lot of rejection, still taking action with determination is a very important behavior to master in life.