The True Meaning of 'Leave Alone Those Who Don't Understand Your Charm'
'Leave alone those who don't understand your charm.' Over ten years ago, someone said that to me.
At the time, I was very happy to be told that I had charm. But looking back now, I think I misunderstood the meaning of those words.
🌖 What I was looking at was the person who wouldn't acknowledge me
I was always worried about the people who wouldn't acknowledge me.
How could I get them to understand?
How could I get them to acknowledge me?
How could I avoid being disliked?
Before I knew it, my heart was always focused on that person.
On the other hand, the existence of people who naturally accepted me or treated me kindly had somehow become something I took for granted.
🌖 It wasn't the person I should have left alone
I've been thinking about it recently.
Those words didn't mean
'Learn to dislike that person'
but rather
'It is okay to let go of trying to get that person to acknowledge you'
I think that is what they meant.
You don't have to try to change the other person, and you don't have to have your worth proven by them.
What I should have left alone was not the person, but that painful attachment.
🌖 Why did I become so attached?
I have gradually realized the reason for that, too.
It wasn't just that I wanted that person to acknowledge me.
I was repeating the unfulfilled feelings of
'I want you to understand me'
'I want you to acknowledge me'
from my relationships with my family when I was a child in my relationships with someone else.
Even though the person changed, I kept seeking the same thing in my heart. That is why I think I was so focused on, and unable to leave, the people who wouldn't acknowledge me.
🌖 You can choose who you focus your heart on
You cannot get everyone to understand you. Even so, there are people who treat me with care.
From now on, rather than chasing after those who won't acknowledge me,
I want to focus my heart on those I can be with in peace. I have come to feel that way.
Those words I received over ten years ago
were not just an encouragement that
'You have charm.'
It was not the person I was to leave alone.
It was my own heart, which kept believing that I had no value unless that person acknowledged me.
I think now that that was the message.
I have started a membership called 'Moonlight Room' 🌙 Please take a look if you'd like 😌⬇️
