Failure ≠ Setback

This spring marks my eighth year, I am Miyase.
Last month, I competed in the 1500m at the Kanaguri Memorial held in Kumamoto. I was given the opportunity to write this as a reflection on that event. Honestly, there is not much I can write about the race itself. Therefore, I will write about my preparations leading up to the race, the insights I gained from it, and my future aspirations.

Winter training, beyond the struggle...

First, I qualified for the Kanaguri Memorial at the Seven Universities Athletic Meet OP 1500m at the end of last July. In that race, Takahashi-san, a Hokkaido University alumnus (currently at Sanyo Special Steel), set a proactive pace for me, and I managed to set a new PB in the 1500m for the first time in three years.

However, I fell a few seconds short of the All-Japan Intercollegiate standard. Since I was not in a condition to aim for a record in the 1500m for the rest of last season, I spent the autumn and winter with the goal of hitting the All-Japan Intercollegiate standard at the following year's Kanaguri Memorial.

While middle-distance events require explosive speed, they also demand high endurance for stability throughout the season and the ability to respond to various race developments. In that sense, my endurance was nowhere near that of top-tier athletes, so I devoted my winter running training primarily to improving that ability. On the other hand, I also incorporated a lot of technical training to build sprint ability and a body capable of withstanding high speeds. I continued to work at about 120% of my usual annual volume in both running distance and weight training. I could feel myself getting stronger, and I was convinced that if things continued this way, I would be able to significantly update my PB in the spring.

That belief crumbled at the end of March. After about a week on a research vessel, I felt anxious about not being able to train, which led to a higher frequency of training while cutting back on rest. The delicate balance between training and rest that I had originally maintained collapsed, and I became ill. It would have been fine if it were just a cold, but I developed a dizzy spell of unknown cause, and I spent about a week unable to even stand or move properly. It was only five days before the race that I was able to exercise properly.

My past self controls my present self

In such a situation, my only support was to believe in my winter efforts and tell myself that they could not possibly be lost in just a few weeks. I have the pride that I poured my soul into winter training, enough to think that as long as I could just start, that effort would somehow carry my body to the finish line.

On the day of the race, my head still felt heavy. Fortunately, the temperature was high, so my body warmed up reasonably well without having to move it too vigorously. I put on my spikes for the first time in a while and finished my warm-up more briefly than usual. I needed to conserve as much physical and mental energy as possible to focus on the race.
In the race, I tried to stay back and remain calm so that I wouldn't have to worry about the development or the running of those around me. I managed to sprint a little at the end, and the result was my 3rd best (probably) time of 3'53"98. It was a better record than I expected. It proved that my winter training was at least not heading in the wrong direction, and I felt a little relieved.

Finally

Honestly, I felt quite desperate due to the poor physical condition just before this race. It was a competition I had been aiming for for a long time, and because it was a type of illness I had never experienced before, I couldn't see the outlook and suffered. However, although I was the one who caused the poor physical condition, it was my past self who saved me. Although I failed in the final adjustments, the efforts and labor I had put in were not an illusion; they were definitely flowing through me in the present. When I thought about that, my anxiety disappeared, and my rest changed from passive to active. Although I was not in the best condition at the starting line, I was able to stand there with my head held a little high.

Now, I also feel glad that this illness occurred early in the season. I had a desire to give it my all this season. However, I was able to realize that I am at an age where I can no longer rely solely on the power of my will, and that I have become more delicate than before. In my future life, this failure will serve as a new card to play and will help me succeed.

Writing this, I was reminded of the many failures and defeats I have committed in the past. But I realized that each of those moments was also a moment when I discovered a new self, a new idea, or a new perspective. Since I'm going to get back up anyway, I'll dare to fall. Since I'm going to win anyway, it's okay to lose. Since I'm going to make up for it anyway, it's okay to be embarrassed. While acknowledging that I am in a different situation than before, I want to run through my student life, which can no longer be extended, carefully and boldly, without losing my aggressiveness.
Since I have been a student for a long time, I will do my best with the goal of graduating from the student category soon and enjoying the student category to the fullest!!